Here we are about a month away from the end of term and it's hard to imagine being busier. Classes, homework, studying, clubs, and all sorts of things take time and energy, and before you know it you're exhausted and ready to be done with everything. At times like this it's easy, at least for me, to get so frustrated and stressed that I don't enjoy what I'm doing. Lately that has been true for many things, but especially dance. I participate in a dance ensemble on campus and we put on one show each term. Most of the term we practice for an hour once a week for each dance - so if you're in two dances you practice for two hours a week, three dances is three hours, etc. However, during the week leading up to the show we practice for at least three, sometimes four or even five hours a day. That suddenly becomes a huge amount of time where we can't do much else because we're either waiting to dance or dancing.
When I was a freshman and my workload was relatively light, it really wasn't bad at all. I loved tech week because I got to watch all the other dances to see the hard work my fellow dancers have put in all term and feel the show really come together with everyone dancing on stage in costumes and makeup at the dress rehearsals. Even tech week sophomore year was pretty manageable because my class schedule worked out in a way that I had no exams or major assignments due during that week. This year, though, my luck ended. I was drowning in schoolwork, stayed up way later than I should have each night to do homework and, on Tuesday, to watch the election, and did not eat many sustainable meals. On top of all of that, I was dancing for roughly four hours a day. We'd run the dances and would usually stay to work on something. I was tired, I was frustrated, and there was a point where I wanted to quit. For just a moment I contemplated not going to rehearsal and focusing on schoolwork instead with the hope I could go to bed before 1:30 in the morning. But then my brain came back and I knew there was no way I could skip a rehearsal, especially not the one two days before the show. For one thing, my pride wouldn't allow me to blow off a commitment and missing a rehearsal would be extremely unfair to everyone else in the ensemble who is making the time to be there. The other reason I knew I could not miss rehearsal is simple: I love to dance.
I'd been spending the week viewing dance as a major time commitment and obligation when there were other things I could be doing instead of looking at it as a time to do something I love. Sometimes when we get really busy or really stressed and focused on perfection, we lose sight of why we started in the first place. I'm not required to be part of this ensemble. I don't get credit for it. I do it because I love it and I love the people I've met because of it. I danced all through elementary and middle school and had to give it up due to time once I got to high school. Being able to return to dancing in college has been amazing. I have grown so much over the past couple of years, both as a dancer and as a person. I am way more confident than I used to be and I believe dance, and my fellow dancers, are huge contributors to that. Dance has given me an opportunity to channel my emotions, tell stories, and make lifelong memories with people I am sure will be lifelong friends. Yes, sometimes it's really hard and causes a lot of stress or occasional pain (my kneecaps are beyond bruised). But, at the end of the day, the sweat, tears, bruises, and time are 110% worth it. The show for this term is done, which means no more dance until January. And I can't wait.
Whenever something's got you down, whether it be a class, sport, club, whatever, take a moment to think about why you got started it. If the answer is "it was required", then I'm afraid there isn't much I can tell you, other than that you'll get through it and never have to do it again. However, if the answer is because you love it, then I promise all that stress is worth it.
