For some of us, average height has never been in the cards. I peaked at 5’ 3/4 of an inch at twelve. As a short person, life is sometimes struggle-ish, but more often than not, it is hilarious.
1. You have asked for help from a stranger in a grocery store.
We all have those moments when we just want the freaking Kroger brand baking soda because it is a quarter cheaper.
2. Climbing on shelves happens every other time.
It is a terrifying sensation when the entire shelving unit starts shaking, and even more unsettling when some of the items are glass.
3. Someone has watched you struggle and THEN offered you help.
The most befuddling moments are hearing a giggle followed up with “Can I help you get that?” Where were you thirty seconds ago average height human?
4. Being mistaken for a small child is not abnormal.
While I may look my age up close, from a distance, I look like I escaped from daycare. In fact, when I worked at a daycare, parents and co-leaders sometimes thought large groups of children were unsupervised, when in reality I was just blending among the mass... *sigh*
5. You become excited when you find petite clothing on sale.
Clothes aren’t cheap (#collegebruh) and clearance is Bae. Anytime I find clothes made for fun-sized people with that sweet clearance tag, I am pretty darn hype.
6. The bottom of your jeans are probably frayed.
I remember having to trim those strings off of my jeans every time I washed them. When rolling came back into style, I almost cried with delight.
7. Putting on heels makes you feel like a giant.
You either strut like no other because you feel gorgeous or start wobbling and crash into things because the extra height has you completely disoriented
8. Organizing by height only means two things:
You’re either about to be first or dead last; there is no in-between for you.
9. You'll never be able to hide in group photos.
From the ugly turtle necks in fifth grade to the mandatory family reunion photos, you can guarantee you’re front and center. Heaven forbid you hate having your photo taken.
10. Everyone assumes you are light as a feather...
And in doing so are unpleasantly surprised when they pick you up. I may be short, but oh man am I dense.
11. Additionally, everyone thinks that you are indeed quite fun to pick up.
While this is great for dancing, it differs in other avenues of life. For example, some of us have that sibling that simply “relocates us” when they want to be cute or desire the last of some food item in the fridge. I am looking at you big brother…
12. You're not quite sure what it is like to be the big spoon.
But really, I can curl around you too. Please know my tiny limbs do not limit my ability to snuggle and comfort. Short people make for optimal “cats.”
13. Doors with really high windows are lethal for you.
The amount of times I have almost or actually been smacked in the face because I wasn’t seen is pathetic. Why not put the windows a little bit lower.. my body is begging you. Please door makers, please.
14. People think it is cute to hold things above your reach.
Okay, okay. Sometimes, this is actually hilarious. Let me tell you something though, if I am hungry, and you’re holding my food hostage.. prepare to get punched in the stomach.
Overall, just look out for the little people. We're prone to tripping.. you! ;)
