Every single day, I hear multiple conversations about how the girl got hurt by the guy because of something the guy did. Usually something like "he liked some other girl's picture on Instagram" or "he never texts me back within like 5 minutes, I'm pretty sure he was cheating on me." Like....okay, ladies, I understand we have high expectations, but when did we become the generation of girls who expect our guy to stay on our leash 24/7? Is it not okay for us to like another guy's picture on Instagram? Are we awful girlfriends if we don't give him a text back as soon as we get it?
So listen up, ladies, if we aren't the right girls, then why are we searching for the right guy?
I say this not because I am perfect and ready more than anything to be in a relationship, but it's actually the complete opposite... I am SO NOT the right girl. I am still finding myself. I am still learning what I need and what I don't need. I am still not even strong enough to withstand a little breakup with a guy I went on 3 dates with; how can I make myself out to be a girl who is ready to withstand a relationship for the rest of my life?
The other day while I was sitting around wallowing over a boy who I thought I was crazy about, my mom asked me, "Do you wake up every morning with the mindset of looking for a situation to love like Jesus would? Because one day a man will see you as the girl who loves the Lord before him, and be that much more attracted to you." Like okay, WOW Mom.
Don't be the girl who can't leave her boyfriend's side. I read an article the other day about giving boyfriends husband privileges, like undivided attention, the title as provider, and sex. Wife material is not that. Women who are wife material understand that just because they are your boyfriend that does not mean they are your provider. They are not supposed to have all of your time and attention, and most importantly, your virginity. Women who are wife material have the strength to say no, and understand that saving those things for your husband make them that much more special. Are you prepared to love the Lord BEFORE him, or are you still the girl who is glued to her boyfriend?
Don't be the girl who easily gets sucked into gossip and bullying. Yes, gossip can be considered bullying. I understand that this is a serious problem that most high school girls struggle with, because I do it too. But how can we love a man for the rest of our lives if we can't even love our fellow sisters? I think having the strength to release ourselves from those types of relationships whose foundation is gossip is the first step of spiritual and relational maturity.
Don't be the girl chasing after the guy because she's broken. How can you love someone wholeheartedly when your heart isn't even whole? We always complain about guys who play us because they are lonely, so just because you are hurting, that does not give you the excuse to do it too. When you are lonely and hurting, you are also vulnerable. Don't break the heart of another, because yours is broken, too.
Ladies, you deserve the world. But before you start falling for guys you don't need, fall to the feet of the Lord Who wants to love you and lead you down the path He has planned for you to meet the man of your dreams. John 15:9 says "Remain in my love." One of my biggest inspirations, Grace Valentine, said "dance with the lord" for when you seek Him, no one else can compare to the love that He gives. My prayer is that you use this time in your life to pour into the word of God, and learn more about yourself so that you can pour into the hearts of others. That is character, that is wife material, and that is personality.
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.
- Psalm 37:7
