For the first time in my life, I can finally say that I am in a healthy and committed relationship.

I’ve had some toxic and negative experiences before, and I can’t tell you how much I can appreciate being with someone that is like a breath of fresh air to my life. My boyfriend and I have an extremely solid relationship.

We respect each other, love to spoil one another, have a solid foundation of trust, and share everything with each other – he is 100% my best friend and I consider myself extremely blessed to have found someone like him.

For others, I know this may not be the case, although I wish it could be – I really do. But just because you do not have what you’re looking for in life or you are not happy with your current situation, doesn’t mean that you get to take it out on my relationship.

Jealousy is an unfortunate thing in this world, and it’s sad to see and hear girls tearing down each other over their relationships. Girls should be happy for one another when they’re in a healthy relationship – you wouldn’t want them to be in an abusive one, right? So why be upset over them finding happiness? Instead, why not determine why you are so unhappy with your life that you feel the need to tear down others.

It’s hidden in backward comments and phrases all the time – and we are sick of hearing it.

“Don’t you ever get sick of spending time with him?”

No, actually I don’t. Sometimes I wish I could spend every second with him. I have to be 8 hours away from my boyfriend while I’m in school, so #sorrynotsorry for wanting to take advantage of the limited amounts of time we do get to spend together.

“You’ll get over the honeymoon phase soon enough.”

So, what, there’s supposed to be like some kind of expiration as tous getting along so well and being happy? No relationship is always sunshine and roses, but real relationships where two people love each other know how to ride out the tough parts and make it work.

“Why do you have to ask his opinion on everything?”

Simple: respect.I value my boyfriend’s opinion on everything. That doesn’t mean we’ll always agree or I’m always going to do whatever he says because I’m mature enough to make my own decisions and be my own person. What it does mean is that we consider ourselves a team, and we’re always looking out for one another. I like including him in my life and not just doing whatever I please with no regards to his thoughts or feelings – newsflash: that’s not how a relationship works.

“Why do you do so much for him? That’s his problem.”

This is the worst. Any problem of his is a problem of mine, because like I said, we’re a team. Relationships are not always 50/50. There’s so much give and take involved. When one of us has a bad day, the other picks up the slack and helps out wherever needed. And yes, I believe in spoiling my boyfriend just as much as he spoils me. I love buying or making him food, gifts, or anything else that makes him happy. He treats me well, so why would I not return that?

So please, stop shaming those of us that are lucky enough to be in a healthy relationship. Everyone out there has a chance at finding their own happiness – and a relationship certainly doesn’t define that. Learn to be happy for others, and then maybe one day you’ll find exactly what you are looking for.