In the age of social media there are many trends that become societal norms in the form of hashtags.

“Man crush Monday”

“Woman crush Wednesday”

“Relationship goals”

Do you notice something about these popular hashtags? That’s right, they’re all about relationships.

We now base self-worth on whether we are ‘relationship goals’ or whether we are someone’s MCM or WCW. One thing I believe is that it is crazy to be so focused on someone else fulfilling us rather than fulfilling ourselves on our own.

I am so guilty of this because for the longest time I would go on social media and see these cute couples and think, “damn, it must be nice to have a relationship like theirs. I hope that one day I find a guy to do that with.” Instead, I should be thinking, “OK, that’s a cute couple why don’t I do that by myself or with my friend.”

Instead of waiting for someone to achieve these goals with we should be proactive and accomplish them on our own, after all, we are totally capable of taking basic PSL pics at the pumpkin patch without a significant other.

We should be having more self-goals; more goals that we can accomplish on our own instead of with someone else. This whole idea of waiting on someone to travel the world or doing ‘fall activities’ with is getting kind of old because it just leads to disappointment. In the end all we have is ourselves so we might as well learn how to do things on our own sooner rather than later.

And saying that you are totally capable of doing things on your own does not mean that you are just a bitter single person, it means that you have figured out that making self-goals before relationship-goals is the secret to success and happiness. No one will ever be able to make you happy or successful until you can do so yourself. Learning that now only prevents you from heartbreak and disappointment in the future.

Relationships are great and so are the cute Instagram pictures that come along with them, but you don’t need to have someone to travel the world with when you can do it on your own. Putting things on hold until you find your soulmate to do it with you isn’t ‘goals’ it’s just dumb.

Don’t be that person who misses out on their entire youth because you were too concerned about finding someone else to make you happy. Make your individual goals and accomplish them. Surround yourself with good friends who make you laugh and make you a better person and everything else will work itself out.