Why #RelationshipGoals Is Not The Way To Define Your Relationship

It seems as social media is getting more and more popular, the hashtags that occur on it vary on a daily basis. There is one, however, that has made a huge uproar in our society, at least among the current teens to 20-year-olds, which is #relationshipgoals. When I first saw it being used, I didn't think too much of it—it's just a hashtag that people use to express things they want to do with their partner or, if they are single, wish to eventually do with their partner. At first this didn't seem so bad, I saw this hashtag with couples graduating together, couples cooking together or going on a vacation together. But then I realized it has become so much more than that. It is becoming the definer of way too many things in a relationship. People are seeking what their partners "should" be doing for them through this hashtag. They'll tag their partner in something that someone else's boyfriend did for them and seemingly expect their boyfriend to do the same. This is where it goes wrong.

I am all for accomplishing things as a couple and moving forward as a couple and enjoying every aspect of life together in the pursuit of marriage or a long-lasting relationship. But it seems as though the expectations of the #relationshipgoals have gone a little too far. There are way too many "expectations" out there for people in relationships. There needs to come a point where you and your partners relationship is not based on what you see online and what you now expect out of them. Instead, simply enjoy your relationship how it is and how it is meant to be. Define your own relationship goals. Don't let the Internet and other people define it for you. It looks different for every couple!

Stop setting unrealistic expectations for each other, it's not healthy and often they may not even be attainable. By reading everyone's relationship goals, it's a lot easier for those in relationships to get upset with each other. Looking on Valentine's Day and seeing all of the different things people did for each other: now other girl's are getting mad at their partner and asking, "Why didn't you do that for me?" That's not the way to go about your relationship. Make your relationship about the two of you and no one else. How others do their relationships is great and all, but you need to be a couple for each other and treat each with respect and love each other in your own ways. Find the things that truly matter, not the materialistic things; setting those materialistic expectations may just cause your partner to stress more and think that they have to be perfect, or vice versa, you thinking that you have to be perfect.

Live a life where you're both proud of your own #relationshipgoals that you set together. Be happy. Love the things you do together and define your #goals in your own way, on your own time, with your own experiences. Then you will be truly happy. Every couple is different, so don't look to those photos of #relationshipgoals as guidance, look at them as another couple doing their own thing and setting their own goals with each other. Living life spontaneously and happy and in love is the best way to go about it, without materialistic expectations from the Internet.

Set your own relationship goals with your partner, set goals for yourselves to grow as people and as a couple, but in a way that makes you both happy. Don't constantly compare yourself and your relationship to what others have. Find the #relationshipgoals that have to do with being good and loyal partners to each other. The goals of eventually getting married and starting a family. There's no set #goals of a couple to attain, these are figurative, these are made up, these photos you see may not even be as perfect as they seem. It all depends on the couple. That's why this definition of #relationshipgoals needs to solely be determined by you and your partner, in order to ensure the happiness of you both.

Constant comparison with other couples on the Internet is only making it harder. Be proud. Love hard. Love yourself. Love your partner. Grow together. Experience life together. Define your own #relationshipgoals!