5 Reasons Why Fall Is The Worst

5 Reasons Why Fall Is The Worst

It's time we faced the facts
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Now I'm sure most of you are shocked by the title of this article, yes you read it right. Now don't get me wrong, I love the Fall season because that means my birthday and Halloween are around the corner and it isn't 1,000 degrees in Texas anymore. While there are many reasons why Fall is the best, here are the reasons why Fall is the worst.

1. Let's all admit it, pumpkin is a shit flavor.

Yes, it's the time of year that for some reason everyone starts putting pumpkin in absolutely EVERYTHING and I hate it. You all know that you are all losing your minds over a squash right? Getting over that fact, let's talk about how nasty it taste. It has this putrid creamy flavor that doesn't taste good unless you add a crap ton of sugar and cinnamon with it. I just want to enjoy my coffee and cakes without having a lumpy squash shoved down my throat, mkay? Although, I am a huge fan of the Dancing pumpkin. Sir, I love your work!


2. Pumpkin Patches (wow it seems like a got beef with pumpkins)

I know that going to pumpkin patches and taking adorable pictures with your family and friends is living the Fall dream but I don't wanna go and you can't make me. It's always so crowded with people fighting over who will get the ugliest pumpkin, kids screaming all over the place, and freaking hay freaking everywhere. Also no, I don't want to take a creepy hay ride from that creepy man named Dale is the flannel shirt, no thank you.

3. Who run the world? Squirrels

During the Fall season you will see a rediculous amount of those beady-eyed furry little creatures. They may seem cute, but I'm pretty sure that squirrels are evil. They always seem to follow you and stare deep into your soul, and you never know when they might attack. I don't trust them, so I try my hardest to respect them. Also since there are so many of them out and about, they all seem to run out in the middle of the street right when my car is driving by. I may not trust the squirrels, but that doesn't mean I want them dead. I have a feeling that one day I'm going to get into a car accident trying to avoid hitting one of those suckers.

4. Instagram

When Fall comes around and the leaves start to change from green, to orange, yellow, and red I agree it's so beautiful, but that's not all I want to see on my stinkin' Instagram feed! During this time of year, everyone suddenly becomes a photographer and thinks that they need to bless the world with this picture of a tree with orange leaves. News flash you don't, I have 10 other people that have done the same thing, it doesn't make you artistic or special. Here's a tip: Just enjoy the beauty of Fall and keep all of the pictures of leaves off of social media, thanks!

5. Sweater Weather

Now that there has been a definite drop in temperature it's time to bring out all of the cozy clothes that you've had stored away since last winter. But now all of these sweaters suddenly aren't good enough for this season, I need more, more, MORE! Fall is the season where I spend most of my money, and it's all on sweaters and scarfs. I have no self-control when it comes to cozy appeal, but there is no reason for a person to own close to 50 sweaters and even more scarfs, but I just can't stop. I blame Fall for all of my financial problems.


But don't let this list fool you, Fall is still my favorite season

Cover Image Credit: Bravelets

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Sorry Not Sorry, My Parents Paid For My Coachella Trip

No haters are going to bring me down.
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With Coachella officially over, lives can go back to normal and we can all relive Beyonce’s performance online for years to come. Or, if you were like me and actually there, you can replay the experience in your mind for the rest of your life, holding dear to the memories of an epic weekend and a cultural experience like no other on the planet.

And I want to be clear about the Beyonce show: it really was that good.

But with any big event beloved by many, there will always be the haters on the other side. The #nochella’s, the haters of all things ‘Chella fashion. And let me just say this, the flower headbands aren’t cultural appropriation, they’re simply items of clothing used to express the stylistic tendency of a fashion-forward event.

Because yes, the music, and sure, the art, but so much of what Coachella is, really, is about the fashion and what you and your friends are wearing. It's supposed to be fun, not political! Anyway, back to the main point of this.

One of the biggest things people love to hate on about Coachella is the fact that many of the attendees have their tickets bought for them by their parents.

Sorry? It’s not my fault that my parents have enough money to buy their daughter and her friends the gift of going to one of the most amazing melting pots of all things weird and beautiful. It’s not my fault about your life, and it’s none of your business about mine.

All my life, I’ve dealt with people commenting on me, mostly liking, but there are always a few that seem upset about the way I live my life.

One time, I was riding my dolphin out in Turks and Cacaos, (“riding” is the act of holding onto their fin as they swim and you sort of glide next to them. It’s a beautiful, transformative experience between human and animal and I really think, when I looked in my dolphin’s eye, that we made a connection that will last forever) and someone I knew threw shade my way for getting to do it.

Don’t make me be the bad guy.

I felt shame for years after my 16th birthday, where my parents got me an Escalade. People at school made fun of me (especially after I drove into a ditch...oops!) and said I didn’t deserve the things I got in life.

I can think of a lot of people who probably don't deserve the things in life that they get, but you don't hear me hating on them (that's why we vote, people). Well, I’m sick of being made to feel guilty about the luxuries I’m given, because they’ve made me who I am, and I love me.

I’m a good person.

I’m not going to let the Coachella haters bring me down anymore. Did my parents buy my ticket and VIP housing? Yes. Am I sorry about that? Absolutely not.

Sorry, not sorry!

Cover Image Credit: Kaycie Allen

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Another Word On Coffee

I Tasted the Raw Bean
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Since my last spilling of words on the topic of coffee, fate has led me in an interesting direction. Allow me to take your hand, just give it here... You're really sweaty.

There I was, an hour before class, dying from the amount if sleep I deprived myself of. I could make coffee or go buy it for a gut punching price. I started some of my own brew, my own volition, my special bean. After pouring an overly confident cup, I nearly cried from a realization: I'm out of creamer. What was I to do? I was almost late for class with a poorly poured cup of black, untainted coffee. I did what anyone who often becomes uncomfortable in easily avoidable situations would do, I panicked and took it with me. I took no notice at first, it wasn't until I had forgotten I had the option to take a sip of boiling liquid that I remembered it wasn't comfort waiting for me in that thermos. Oh no, it was a surprise.

It wasn't too bad,for the first two hours. If I had a cup twice as small I might have finished it. But sadly, my heart couldn't take it. I went with the cautious route, too. Slow sips, a nice pace, the whole deal. I could only make it a fourth of the way down before hauling cheek to the nearest source of refined udders.

I finished it shortly after juicing up that bean torment. Maybe I'll acquire more of a taste for the condensed asphalt in the future, until then, my mouth remains the same.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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