2017 has been a year of contentment for me because I’ve finally accepted that being single is okay. I know there were many times where I wanted to keep up with people around me. I wanted to have what they had in their relationships, and I wanted to be as happy as they looked. This year, I’ve finally come to terms that my time for being with “the one” hasn’t yet arrived, and instead of moping about it anymore, I’m embracing it.
I’ve found that I overall feel better as an individual because I’m focusing fully on school and spending as much time as I can with my friends before our careers take us to separate places. I’m taking chances that I know a relationship would likely make me think twice about. I’m planning to study abroad, I am looking at out-of-state graduate programs, and I am taking time to pamper myself. I know that when I was constantly worried about finding “the one,” I felt more stressed because I felt as if I was always falling short of this irrational goal. By embracing being single, I’ve been able to do a lot of soul-searching and am ultimately settling into my best self. I’d like to share with you some of the reasons that being single is actually a great thing!
1. You always have plenty of free time outside of school.
Imagine having to schedule in dates and “bae time” when you’re balancing two exams, a group project, and the remaining 14 episodes of “Gossip Girl” on Netflix. You can use that free time to shop, binge-watch other Netflix series, go on spontaneous adventures, sleep, or plan a girls’ night.
2. You can save money.
You don’t have to take turns paying for dinner or a movie. There are no anniversary or holiday gifts you need to buy. You literally can spend all of your money on you. Treat yo’self!
3. You can flirt with whoever you want.
Cute pizza delivery guy. Hot guy nose-deep in a stack of books at Starbucks. Muscular trainer at the gym. The possibilities are endless.
4. There are no commitments.
If you want to go away for the weekend, you don’t have to tell anyone what you’ll be up to. If you plan on moving for a job in the next couple of years, you don’t have to worry about long-distance. You can make decisions for yourself knowing that they won’t affect anyone but yourself. Take this time to travel and try new things.
5. It gives you more time to focus on your personal growth.
Relationships are a partnership. You have to understand what you want to contribute to a relationship and what you expect to get out of it. While single, you can use your free time to learn more about what you want in life and how a partner will enhance those dreams and experiences. Of course, you learn important lessons in relationships, but taking time to focus on learning about yourself sets you up for better circumstances later. And, if you have career goals you’re after, reach them. Establishing yourself professionally and economically is a very rewarding feeling, especially when you’ve done it all for yourself.
6. You can learn to make yourself happy.
Many people enter relationships with the mentality that their partner is supposed to provide the happiness they’re looking for. They end up being let down time after time because their partner seems to fall short of making them happy. Reaching contentment with being single allows you to explore your wants and desires. It encourages you to do things by yourself, like going to a movie, joining a book club, or learning something new. Happiness is hard to find sometimes, but knowing that you’ve found it for yourself makes it somehow feel even better in the end.
