I've experienced both sides of sorority recruitment. I know the ins and outs of stalking, rating and judging women I've barely even met.
I can sing my sorority's door songs forwards and backwards with my eyes closed while walking up and down stairs in four inch wedges while simultaneously smiling and clapping.
I can make a plausible guess of which PNM will join which house simply based on where she is from.
While sorority recruitment is a fun, intense and exciting week, it also one of the hardest weeks of a young collegiate woman's life. Recruitment is especially hard for the women who have chosen to attend an SEC school whose Greek roots run very deep.
There have been countless studies based on the correlation between self-esteem and formal sorority recruitment, and the results show a significant drop.
So, here's my point: We have to find women who want to join a sorority for the right reasons, and we have to recruit these women.
Every chapter wants beautiful and smart girls. Every chapter wants girls who will impress guys and in return, result in a mixer invitation. Every chapter wants girls who come from strong backgrounds.
But what about the women who maybe aren't identical to Victoria's Secret models? What about the women who may have emotional baggage?
One of the most typical recruitment questions that most women ask is, "What are you looking to gain from joining a sorority?"
When I asked this question to almost every PNM I talked to, her response was so basic and vague, it made me cringe.
"I don't know. I'm just looking for a sisterhood and a way to get involved." And just like that, we moved onto the next clipboard question.
You mean to tell me you're willing to pay roughly $2,000 a semester, and all you want to gain from your experience is a sisterhood and a way to get involved? That sounds like a rip off to me.
Women should join a sorority for the sisterhood and volunteer opportunities, yes, but that should not be all we are looking for.
We should join sororities to make an impact. We should join sororities to be held to a higher standard, and we should want to find a place where there are women who will tell us when we are wrong but help us find ways to better ourselves. We should join sororities to be held accountable for our actions and to learn how to become better leaders and members of society.
We should not join sororities because we want to meet boys, go to parties and have cute game day buttons (although those things are fun, too). Nor should we join a certain sorority because our best friends are in that chapter.
We should join sororities because their values are parallel to our own. We should look for our place in a community of women who are confident and want to help teach their sisters how to love themselves as well. We should join sororities to learn communication and time management skills. We should join sororities to help change the world.
If I've learned anything from formal recruitment, it is this: be true to yourself, be honest and open about your intentions and find a place in the world where you will constantly be pushed to learn and grow.
