Our feet make soft pattering noises as we nervously run through the door that leads to backstage. My heart pounds violently in my chest. My stomach churns harder than a colonial woman making butter for the market in her town. Droplets of sweat permeate through the pores of my body as I try to convince my mind to transform these nerves into jitters of excitement. I think in my head “what on earth have I gotten myself into? Why did I think I had the qualifications to stomp on a team with my sorority in front of hundreds of my friends? I’ve never even performed on a stage before.”

I search for a way out so that this fear of being on that stage in the intense spotlight will diminish. But it’s too late to back out now. I exchange glances of nervousness with two of my friends who are now on stage with me. The red velvet curtain slowly rises, I take a deep breath, and the adrenaline takes over. The curtain closes, the lights go out. Feelings of accomplishment invade my inner being to where I can’t help but smile now. That was incredible. Participating in stomp fest, something I’d never done before, not only taught me confidence and how rewarding it is to be bold and try new things, but it also brought me to the realization of something.

I realized that we all live in such a cookie cutter world. We are taught that we can’t branch out of what we are good at or what we already know because if we do, people might see our flaws. We grow up in oversized houses, we’re raised to follow a certain plan — go to school, follow the rules, make good grades, get into college, earn a degree, get a job, find a spouse, have kids, purchase a new car every few years, buy an oversized house of our own. Then someday retire with enough money to not have to worry. That’s the American dream right?

No. This is what frazzles me. We live this way because it’s comfortable — it’s what we’re “supposed to do.” It’s what “everyone does.” America hides behind technology and conformity. Why? Because it’s comfortable. We don’t want people to see us as anything other than perfect. But on the inside, behind our beautiful front doors, we are getting eaten away by insecurity and boredom. This is not the way life is supposed to feel. While I do know that an education and making money to provide for your future family is vital, it doesn’t need to follow a certain rulebook and look glamorous to everyone around us.

So then why are we so afraid to get out of our comfort zone? Why are we too scared to try new things? And how can we change this?

I think our first step to solving this puzzle is to stop caring about other people’s opinions. You want to wear a turtleneck polka dot sweater dress? Wear that turtleneck polka dot sweater dress. You want to move to Tennessee and live in the mountains like you have always dreamt of, but are too afraid of what people might have to say about that? Pack up your bag and go find a house of your own with that beautiful view. You want to take a year off after high school and travel the world? Save up money and do it. In the long run, no one’s opinion of you matters except your own. A Dr. Seuss quote says, “be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

Another way I think we can change this is if we stop being so selfish. We think that bigger is better and that looking good is what will get you far. But it’s not. We need to stop living in our own bubbles of vanity and comparison. When we compare our lives to others, we constrict ourselves from so many immense and unique opportunities. “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Comparing yourself is selfish. When you care only about being better than others, you get sucked into a warped world of constantly keeping up with looking good on social media, having the newest things, etc.

Maybe instead, you could step away from that cell phone and mirror for a while. You are beautiful; you are enough. Once you can believe those things to be true, selflessness and contentment will slowly wrap you up in a big welcoming hug. You will have the ability to enrich yourself in the world and find new things to be passionate about. You will be able to be bold and watch doors of experience and freedom open all over the place. The title of my article is “Rapunzel Let Your Hair Down. Why you should too”, but after thinking about it, I’d like to change a little something about that statement. Don’t just let your hair down. Get out of that same ol’ castle you’re all cozy in. There’s a whole world out there just waiting patiently for you to come find. Get out there and try new things. Get uncomfortable, that’s when you’ll really live.

And if you ever get the chance to join a stomp team, I highly recommend it.