What is rape?

One would think the answer to this question is obvious, but it's not. There is a clear cut, accepted view of rape that society accepts. What if I were to tell you differently? What if I said rape isn't what you think it is?

Rape isn't an episode of Law and Order: SVU.

Rape isn't only when a boogey man jumps out from behind a bush or an alley.

Rape isn't always violent and angry.

Rape can be quiet. A silent struggle.

What is rape?

Is rape when a husband and wife are so used to being with each other, that either party just agrees to sex to make the other happy?

Is it when the husband isn't against having sex, but not for it either? Is it when you know he doesn't want you but doesn't want to fight so he just does it.

Is rape the drunk girl at the party who says no, but can't fight back?

Or is rape the same drunk girl, but who says yes? Even though she can't remember her own name or where she is? Is that rape?

Is rape when someone agree's to go on a date, then goes back to the person's apartment and they consent to kissing, but it gets taken farther?

Is rape the boyfriend and girlfriend who have dated for a while and she lets things get farther than she is comfortable with?

Is it when she says she isn't ready but he keeps pressuring her?

Is when she doesn't say no when he goes in? Is it when she just lays there and doesn't fight back? Is it where she just takes it?

Is rape the guy jumping out from an alley and pinning you against the wall?

Is rape when someone you trust betrays you and drugs you?

Is it when the kid you sit next to in class asks you out and you agree, but then they took your consent to the date to be consent to sex? Is it when you don't want to be a tease or slut-shamed?

Is rape when the guy or girl sleeps around and they say they were raped, but no one believes them because they have a history?

Is rape when a professor coerces you into sex to pass the class?

What is rape?

Is it quiet?

Or loud?

Violent?

Or nothing at all?

Is it painful?

Is rape the lack of consent?

Is rape an action?

Or can it be a feeling or emotion?

Or is your body confused and reacts even though you beg it not to?

Is rape definable?

Or is rape just a word that no one understands until it happens to them?

Is rape something that fits into one small box?

Or is it complex and vague?

So...I ask you again...think hard...

What is rape?

Maybe rape is everything and nothing.

Do you know what rape is?

Or do you assume you know?

How is "What is rape?" such a complex and confusing question?

How can we know what it is when no one speaks of it?

Is rape a collective voice?

Or a single voice in the crowd begging to be heard?

What is rape?