Pretty much everyone is familiar with "F**kboys" at this point, those college aged men who wear expensive clothes, have a nice smile, are all about talking to girls, but eventually get exposed for who they truly are: unintelligent, dimwitted, and selfish characters. If you've ever been to a college frat party, or a Thursday at a bar, you see f**kboys everywhere, planning a way to woo their next girl by acting all confident while drinking copious amounts of beer and taking shot after shot of (usually very cheap) liquor. They can be quite an interesting and loud bunch when in packs.
Honestly, I couldn't care less about a bunch of simple alpha males going nuts and being the life of the party. However, there is one thing about the typical f**kboy that drives me nuts to the point where I literally can't stand to be around f**kboys anymore. It is, the large frequency of f**kboys out there, paired with the emotional damage f**kboys can cause by objectifying and possibly even taking advantage of women, can cause the false assumption that "all guys are the same."
Now, before I get ahead of myself, I want to make something clear. Don't think that I'm just some frustrated hopeless romantic who's taking it out on other guys. While it is true that it's been quite some time since my last relationship, I am single mostly by choice, and only want to pursue something if someone truly special comes along. Those kind of people are rare.
Still, as a guy who HATES seeing women being taken advantage of, and as a guy who wants women, or anyone for that matter, to feel comfortable being around me, I can say the f**kboys pose a huge challenge to the decent men of this world. This is because over time, f**kboys have evolved to look more and more like nice people on the outside. For example, their wardrobe has been on point as of late. Often times, I find myself in a social setting being well-dressed, and when talking to people, particularly women, I often get a "You're actually a lot nicer than I thought you were going to be when I saw you." Today, simply DRESSING NICE can get you mistaken for a f**kboy.
Another way the f**kboy has evolved is through the art of pretending to be emotionally intelligent. In most cases, emotional intelligence is a sign of wisdom and maturity, so why wouldn't someone look for that in anyone their friendly with? Many f**kboys have a script of things they ask to make them seem sensitive and sophisticated even though they're not. They'll ask things like "How've your brother and sister been lately?" or "Where did you get that awesome bracelet?" These are questions with substance that encourage discussion rather than just "Uhhhh, so....um.....wanna make out?" F**ckboys really are chameleons.
So how can the women and decent men of the world stop F**kboys from roaming around? Well, that's the one problem. While there are obviously things we can do to make sure a woman is never taken advantage of, these isn't really much we can do to eliminate the f**kboys themselves. It's not like one day they'll wake up and decide not to be f**kboys. All we can do is learn to recognize f**kboys. For women, that means trusting your gut and making sure the guy truly is respectful. For decent men, that means keep being respectful, but be more confident. F**kboys have all the confidence in the world, so if we're more confident, we can throw them off their game, and become great partiers ourselves who are fun and crazy, but also RESPECTFUL TO WOMEN.
I wrote this because I have been perceived as a f**kboy by a few people as of late. I looked very sharp wardrobe wise and my conversation skills seemed a little scripted. I guess that set off the f**kboy alarm. If this is going to keep happening, we need to show these f**kboys that we won't stand for them anymore. How I long for a day when men and women can interact together no strings attached, but that's probably not happening anytime soon with sexism and sexualization everywhere. It's wishful thinking, but this was a rant, one I really needed to get off my chest.