A Rant On F**kboys, From A Guy

A Rant On F**kboys, From A Guy

They ruin everything!

Pretty much everyone is familiar with "F**kboys" at this point, those college aged men who wear expensive clothes, have a nice smile, are all about talking to girls, but eventually get exposed for who they truly are: unintelligent, dimwitted, and selfish characters. If you've ever been to a college frat party, or a Thursday at a bar, you see f**kboys everywhere, planning a way to woo their next girl by acting all confident while drinking copious amounts of beer and taking shot after shot of (usually very cheap) liquor. They can be quite an interesting and loud bunch when in packs.

Honestly, I couldn't care less about a bunch of simple alpha males going nuts and being the life of the party. However, there is one thing about the typical f**kboy that drives me nuts to the point where I literally can't stand to be around f**kboys anymore. It is, the large frequency of f**kboys out there, paired with the emotional damage f**kboys can cause by objectifying and possibly even taking advantage of women, can cause the false assumption that "all guys are the same."

Now, before I get ahead of myself, I want to make something clear. Don't think that I'm just some frustrated hopeless romantic who's taking it out on other guys. While it is true that it's been quite some time since my last relationship, I am single mostly by choice, and only want to pursue something if someone truly special comes along. Those kind of people are rare.

Still, as a guy who HATES seeing women being taken advantage of, and as a guy who wants women, or anyone for that matter, to feel comfortable being around me, I can say the f**kboys pose a huge challenge to the decent men of this world. This is because over time, f**kboys have evolved to look more and more like nice people on the outside. For example, their wardrobe has been on point as of late. Often times, I find myself in a social setting being well-dressed, and when talking to people, particularly women, I often get a "You're actually a lot nicer than I thought you were going to be when I saw you." Today, simply DRESSING NICE can get you mistaken for a f**kboy.

Another way the f**kboy has evolved is through the art of pretending to be emotionally intelligent. In most cases, emotional intelligence is a sign of wisdom and maturity, so why wouldn't someone look for that in anyone their friendly with? Many f**kboys have a script of things they ask to make them seem sensitive and sophisticated even though they're not. They'll ask things like "How've your brother and sister been lately?" or "Where did you get that awesome bracelet?" These are questions with substance that encourage discussion rather than just "Uhhhh, so....um.....wanna make out?" F**ckboys really are chameleons.

So how can the women and decent men of the world stop F**kboys from roaming around? Well, that's the one problem. While there are obviously things we can do to make sure a woman is never taken advantage of, these isn't really much we can do to eliminate the f**kboys themselves. It's not like one day they'll wake up and decide not to be f**kboys. All we can do is learn to recognize f**kboys. For women, that means trusting your gut and making sure the guy truly is respectful. For decent men, that means keep being respectful, but be more confident. F**kboys have all the confidence in the world, so if we're more confident, we can throw them off their game, and become great partiers ourselves who are fun and crazy, but also RESPECTFUL TO WOMEN.

I wrote this because I have been perceived as a f**kboy by a few people as of late. I looked very sharp wardrobe wise and my conversation skills seemed a little scripted. I guess that set off the f**kboy alarm. If this is going to keep happening, we need to show these f**kboys that we won't stand for them anymore. How I long for a day when men and women can interact together no strings attached, but that's probably not happening anytime soon with sexism and sexualization everywhere. It's wishful thinking, but this was a rant, one I really needed to get off my chest.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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5 Great Dates That Fit Your Budget

Cheaper loving

Everyone loves a good date. How can you not? Nothing can ever really compare to spending some quality time with that person you love (hopefully). But when money is tight, it is hard meeting the demands of fancy restaurants, $15 movie tickets and $8 boxes of popcorn. So instead of breaking the bank, try these cheaper dates instead!

1. Drive-ins

Yes! They do still exist, and they are much cheaper than their movie theatre counterpart. Drive-ins are perfect for seeing the latest films for a much cheaper price and a more personal experience. You get to be in the privacy of your own car and bring your own yummy (and cheaper) snacks!

2. Picnics

You may not be one for the outdoors, but even so, you have to picnic with your loved one at least once throughout your relationship. You get to be in nature which can actually be very refreshing and a change of pace from the business of daily life. Also, you can make inexpensive sandwiches and tasty snacks to share, and who doesn’t love that?

3. Exercise Date!

I know, it sounds horrible. Who likes to exercise? Well, working out with your significant other can actually be much more fun than you may perceive. Whether it is at the gym, at home, or on a run, you can motivate each other to be better, work harder, and hopefully get in better shape! When you’re bringing out the best in each other, the relationship can only become stronger, making not only your exercise dates more pleasant but also all other aspects of the relationship.

4. Puppies and Pet Stores

Who doesn’t love puppies? Take a trip to a local pet store or ASPCA with your significant other. Animals can make even the worst of days a little bit better. Take some time to play with the puppies, kitties, and other cute fluffy animals to boost your mood and spend some quality time with the one you love.

5. Dinner Dates (at home)

Going out to dinner is great, but it can get very expensive. By making your own meal at home, you can bond with your significant other as you struggle to cook. You still get to experience great food, but this time in the comfort of your own home. Also, you’ll have leftovers for a while, so even if you do have to spend a little extra, you will save on meals in the coming days.

Dates don’t always have to be elaborate expeditions to the most expensive restaurants or resorts. Looking for other types of ways to spend time with your significant other can be extremely fun and creative. These five options are just some of the numerous ways to really experience quality time with your favorite person.

Cover Image Credit: Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

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6 Personality Quizzes To Take With Your New Partner

How important is compatibility in your relationship?

Online quizzes are crazy popular these days. They can be used as a tool to communicate with your partner about your needs, desires and personality quirks. Do not let an online quiz determine the effectiveness of your relationship, though. You should use them as a general metric, and you can use the results as a common language in your relationship.

1. The 5 Love Languages

The 5 Love Languages are Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Quality Time, Acts of Service and Receiving Gifts. The results of the quiz will allow you to discover how you receive love. For example, if your number one love language is Words of Affirmation, then you would communicate to your partner that is something you need in a relationship. The 5 Love Languages is something worth asking everyone in your life to take so you can properly appreciate those around you.

2. Attachment Styles

Hello! This is important! Learning about adult attachment styles changed my life. I'm serious. I thought I was a crazy person because I struggle to settle down in one relationship. This quiz has very self-explanatory results. But, if you're ready for your life to be changed: read "Attached" by Amir Levine.

3. Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)

MBTI is the most basic of personality quizzes. It asses people in four dimensions: introversion/extroversion, sensing/intuition, thinking/feeling and judging/perceiving. I recommend MBTI because it is so popular that people have often taken it before and know their results. Occasionally, people include it on their Tinder bios.

4. "36 Questions That Lead to Love"

Okay, this isn't a quiz. However, these questions are a great way to get to know someone. I have my own personal list of questions I ask a potential partner, but here are 36 questions if you can't think of any.

5. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married"

Don't panic. I'm not suggesting that you and your new partner are getting married. But, if you are trying to decide if you two are compatible long-term, these are the hard questions you should ask.

6. How kinky are you?

This one is just for fun. If you and your partner want to see what this quiz says your kinks are, it's worth it. I encourage you to not take the results too seriously. Read about how to practice kink safely (here and here) if that's something you and your partner are interested in.

Cover Image Credit: @couplegoals

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