For everyone that attends the fabulous school that is Ramapo College of New Jersey, you know it is a fabulous school; and I'm not being facetious, but you also know of the recent turmoils the students in the school have faced … and are facing.
According to NJ.com, a party was thrown that took things too far and a woman ended up sexually assaulted. Students were arrested, and more importantly, a woman’s life was scarred with an experience that could not be forgotten. In turn, Ramapo took this news as a reason to change a few rules that are to be followed in the student handbook, particularly where alcohol consumption is concerned. Any violation of these rules would result not only in steep fines that would be difficult even for a person without thousands of dollars of tuition debt over their heads, but also could result in expulsion from the school.
To a lot of students, myself included, this changes NOTHING about the sexual assault that has taken place. A woman should not be afraid to go out and have fun. A man should not think that any woman walking around is just another walking garden to enter whenever he pleases. I’ve never claimed the term "feminist," but what I am is a person that believes that everyone should be treated with equal respect and dignity. And there is nothing respectful about crawling into bed with a person that doesn’t have the cognitive ability to say no. There is nothing "macho" or "impressive" about raping a woman. Vomit touches my uvula as I type this. Ramapo’s response to this horrific event is, in itself, a nonresponse to the idea of rape. But the punishments they see fit … I do as well.
Alcohol does not induce rape. It’s not an equation that fits perfectly hand in hand. But to everyone who believes in the 18th Amendment, myself included, there is nothing wrong with making people think twice about underage alcoholism. To everyone that sees the severe punishments as unfair to the "kids" at Ramapo, I encourage you to:
One time, when I was 14, I was offered a drink by a friend of the family. He was in his 40s at the time and pressed the Solo Cup gently on my chest. I kindly declined. I still remember his words, clear as day:
“C’mon, Junior. Quit being such a bitch."
He didn't yell it. He didn't need to.
This wasn’t the first time I was ridiculed for my lack of attraction to liquor. I tried it once, when I was younger. Acid down my throat. It was then that I decided it wasn’t for me. And as I grew up, I was surrounded by reasons why my abstinence from alcohol would prove fruitful.
In my youth, I witnessed alcohol be the tempter that resulted in domestic violence (as apart from what, international violence?). Yeah, someone in my distant family tried to take a swing at her husband at a family party. With an iron. If it weren't for the fact that she was ineptly slow and I was able to restrain her, she would have succeeded. The next day, this grown woman claimed she was "tipsy," and didn't mean to cause that much of an uproar. I'd hate to think what a person, that had half the life experience she had, not to mention a quicker swing, could do under the same alcoholic temptation.
In my time in Children's Hospital, I had the pleasure of meeting an older teen who was so full of life. He had so much charisma, more than me, even though we were both stuck in wheelchairs. He told me he was driving drunk and high, and T-boned a tree. At the time, the Children's Hospital doctors weren't sure if he would ever move his legs again. The kid was no older than 20 and he was told he would never have the pleasure of standing again.
So when someone says Ramapo banning alcohol doesn't solve anything, I respectfully disagree. It doesn't solve the existential crisis that is misogyny and its tight grip on the world. It never will. And I beg Ramapo College to see reason regarding that. And I'm fully confident that Ramapo knows its lack of action on women's rights is wrong and I have faith we'll be seeing another side of the school in regards to those horrors that we as people should not, and cannot, be afraid to talk about. But when you do talk about Ramapo's new, stricter ban on alcohol, don’t say it won’t change anything. Because it will.
