I Mended Myself By Creating A Quilt And I Found Memories Sewn Into It, Too

I Mended Myself By Creating A Quilt And I Found Memories Sewn Into It, Too

Each person's battle with life is unique, and mine just happens to include sewing pieces of fabric together in cool designs.


During October of last year, my now-ex broke up with me. We had been together for almost a year and a half (which is a long time for high school relationships, OK? don't judge), and I was honestly completely broken. It was the first time someone had broken up with me, not the other way around, and I didn't really know how to act.

My mom, the ever-loving woman that she is, understood how I was feeling, and asked me if there was anything I had ever wanted to try. Something new to take my mind off things.

I told her I wanted to quilt.

I don't really know why I wanted to quilt (I still don't), but that day my mom took me to the local quilt store (located in a red caboose and called Cupcake Quilts) to get me all the stuff I needed to quilt.

And boy, was it expensive.

Like hundreds of dollars expensive.

But I knew this is what I wanted to do, and I was going to finish it, no matter what.

Even though it wasn't easy going at times (I messed up lots), I worked on the quilt. I worked on it through family visits (and subsequent yelling-matches), memorizing Hamlet's "To Be or Not To Be" speech (the above picture is me taking a break while Kenneth Branagh's version plays in the background), and going on another first date (and finding out that you actually like this boy from your English class a lot. Like A LOT). Every piece of my life that's happened since I put the first stitch down is engrained in that quilt. A part of my life is in that quilt.

I finished quilting it a few days ago (I love to procrastinate. Always) and now it's being finished up by the super nice ladies at the quilt shop. When I get it back, I plan to take lots of pictures with it because I made it. It's mine! I still can't believe that I actually made a quilt (for the most part) completely by myself, and I was self-taught.

Even though the quilt started as a distraction from a break-up, it turned into a celebration of practically my entire senior year and everything that went into it. This first quilt of mine is a reminder that life goes on, and it's up to you how you live it. I'm so incredibly proud of not only this quilt (can you believe I made it?) but of who I've become. When I started this quilt, I was a completely different person than I am now. It's awesome that I'm able to hold my character development in my hands and realize how much I've changed.

Finishing this project is an awesome reward for just being alive. It's a tribute to the fact that no matter what happens, you will recover. Even if the bad times have been going on for a while, you have to keep holding out hope that the good times will come.

Each person's battle with life is unique, and mine just happens to include sewing pieces of fabric together in cool designs.

Life can be funny like that sometimes.

(P.S.: I've already started my second one).

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A Letter To My Best Friend On Valentine's Day

Because you are my ultimate Valentine.

To my beautiful best friend,

Warning: This letter is about to get extremely cheesy. I am talking four cheese lasagna cheesy. But no one deserves a love letter like this more than you do.

This Valentine’s Day, I want to express my love for you. On this wondrous occasion with which most people express their love to their significant other, I want to tell you, my best friend, how much I cherish our friendship.

SEE ALSO: A Valentine's Day Love Letter To My Girl Best Friends

You are the ultimate love of my life. Boys have come and gone but you remain a constant; for that I am grateful. You have been there for me when my family could not be; for that I am grateful. You have been my backbone, my rock, and all those other clichés people use to describe the people they care about, and yet you have been so much more than that as well; for that I am grateful.

All my love this Valentine’s Day goes out to you, my friend, because you do not receive it enough. You have picked me up out of the dirt, brushed me off, and kissed my wounds more times than I can count, and I will never be able to thank you enough for that, but I am sure am going to try.

Thank you for the midnight cries. Thank you for the midnight laughs. Thank you for ordering way too much food with me and still just eating it all. Thank you for the advice, both solicited and unsolicited. Thank you for telling me what I need to hear, even when it isn’t what I want to hear. Thank you for the silly pictures. Thank you for the stupid inside jokes. Thank you for making bad decisions with me. Thank you for laughing with me and laughing at me. Thank you for the endless memories.

SEE ALSO: An Open Letter to the Best Friend I've Ever Had

More than anything, I want you to know that I love you. I love you. You are the family I get to choose, the one I go to when I have nowhere else to turn. You are the one I know I can always run to, whether we saw each other yesterday or haven’t seen each other in a year. You have played a part in molding who I am as a person, and I am so grateful for having such an amazing person affecting my life in such a positive way.

With all the love in my heart,

Your friend
Cover Image Credit: https://www.facebook.com/natalie.pederson.5/photos

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Blood Doesn't Determine Family

Blended families are just as much of a family as a traditional one.


If you look above, you can see that have a very large family on my mother's side. Between my grandparents, aunts and uncle, cousins and my own immediate family, we're at thirty-three members and counting. All branches of our family tree have busy lives, so we don't get to see each other as much as often as we would hope to. Christmas is the one time a year where we all finally get together for the evening. If you sat in on our holiday party, you may think that we have a couple screws loose, but there is no doubt that you would be able to feel the love radiating from room to room.

If you look at the picture I chose for my header, you can see all of the cousins gathered for our yearly picture. Dysfunctional, of course, but you can tell that love is there. Would it surprise you that out of our entire huge family, less than half of us are blood-related?

I come from a blended family, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Blood does not determine family to us. Love does.

Divorce can be a messy thing, especially when children are involved. Both my aunt and uncle had remarried into relationships that already had children. For the most part, none of us can really ever remember a time when we weren't considered family. We don't ever look at each other as not being related. We never will. Family to us is the love and support that is shared unconditionally between us.

As I said, you would never be able to tell we weren't blood-related unless I told you. Not only do we all look similar to one another (which again is odd, because if the marriages had never taken place, we would just have a ton of doppelgangers running around), but the love and passion that we radiate is unmistakable that we have a bond that will never be broken, let alone determined by biology.

Blended families tend to get a bad rap sometimes from some of the horror stories that can come from second marriages. Not only that, but some people still are stuck in the idea that the only socially acceptable type of family is one where the lineage is clear and concise. Although I can see where these people come from, I don't believe that because there is a lack of shared genetics between all of us, our love is any less strong.

Family is those who will answer a call or text late at night because you need someone to talk to. They're the ones that you end up staying at their house and talking for hours when you meant to make a quick trip in. They are there for you no matter the situation and always believe in you one hundred percent.

Traditional families have a lot of love too, undoubtedly. But please, do not tell me that my family is any less of a family of a family because of its makeup. We have just as much love between us as families with the same bloodline. Blood does not determine the amount of love and affection between all of us. It never will. We will love each other as much as a traditional family. We never look at each other as a mixed family, so please stop treating us as such.

I've said it so many times, but I'll remind you once more. Blood does not determine family, love does-- and I love my family more than life itself.

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