Just Because I Am Quiet Does Not Mean I Am Weak

Just Because I Am Quiet Does Not Mean I Am Weak

If you assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak, you're in for a rude awakening.

ashleigh
ashleigh
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Earlier this week I did an exercise with a few of my sorority sisters where we chose words to describe each other. One of the girls got to me and she said "powerful." At first, I was really confused. No one has ever used a word like that to describe me. People that have known me for a very long time might say "confident." I've even had people use the words "mysterious" or "intimidating," but never powerful.

She went on to explain that, while I'm not necessarily powerful in the sense of being physically strong or even bossy, but that my being a naturally quiet person doesn't make me weak. And after I thought about it for a second, I realized that she was completely right. I'm not weak. I don't let people walk all over me. I stand up for what I believe in. The older I get, the less afraid I am to be who I am.

I'm very thankful to have people in my life that understand that and see those kinds of things in my personality that I don't always notice about myself. But her statement also got me to wondering, how many other people see me and do think that my being quiet makes me weak? How many people see true introverts in their lives (I consider myself to be more of an ambivert) and think that they can be easily swayed or taken advantage of?

I am writing this article for those people. The people that believe that any girl that isn't always "loud" or "goofy" is somehow less than or has less of a personality. The people that think they can determine someone else's emotional strength based on how outgoing they are. The people that are convinced that someone who is quiet can't be a leader. The people that think that because I don't always have something to say that I'm scared to speak, or not confident. The people that never even take the time to get to know the more outgoing side of me because they label me from the beginning as "quiet."

You are wrong.

I am not weak. I am not a pushover. I am not a follower. My quietness doesn't mean that I am afraid to lead, or that I can't. I have seen and experienced things that some of you will never understand. I am not bored or uninterested. I am not stuck up.

So maybe I'm not always smiling. Maybe I seem a little intimidating or mysterious at first. I don't mean to seem rude or bored. Silence doesn't bother me. Sometimes, I just prefer to listen. It's a lot easier to get to know someone when you simply listen to what they're saying. It's okay to be a listener sometimes. Having a quiet nature is just a part of who I am. It is not all that I am.

I am also confident. I am a good listener, which makes me a great leader. I am funny in a way that you don't notice at first. I care about people. I stand up for what I believe is right. I am unashamed of who I am. I have a story to tell and I will not be ignored or interrupted. You cannot walk all over me.

I AM powerful, not in spite of my quietness, but because of it.

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47 Things All Female Athletes Have Said

Yes, I know I am sweating a lot. No, I do not enjoy practices. Yes, I have said all 47 of these.
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Whether you're a collegiate athlete, or a high school one, you have probably found yourself saying most of these phrases. Us athletes know that the athlete life isn't for everyone, and we often find ourselves questioning if it's still for us. So, this is for all my fellow athletes.

All my fellow athletes who know the struggle is undoubtedly real, and who find themselves saying these 47 phrases almost as often as I do.

* * *

1. Do you have an extra hair tie?

2. What if we just said no? What if we just didn't run when the whistle is blown?

3. I, like, really, am not feeling practice today.

4. Do these pants make my quads look big?

5. Are you going to eat before or after practice?

6. I'm so sore.

7. Want to get McDonald's after practice?

8. Did you see that she wore makeup to a preseason practice?

9. I actually looked like a girl today.

10. I wonder what college would be like if I wasn't an athlete.

11. We're up before the sun way too often.

12. Is it gross if I don't shower after weights?

13. How hard do you think practice will be today?

14. Coach is literally crazy.

15. I ate like 20 minutes ago, so there's a 50% chance I puke during this practice.

16. I'm not going to drink the protein shake they gave us because it's going to make me gain weight.

17. I think my legs are bigger than his, so I can't date him.

18. I think my arms are bigger than his, so I can't date him.

19. Today in class a non-athlete was talking about how busy her schedule is. It was so annoying.

20. Thinking about preseason makes me want to cry.

21. Is it even healthy for us to have this many practices in one day?

22. I'll be right back, I'm having PGD (pre-game dumps).

23. I think I'm going to throw up.

24. I should have worked out more on my own.

25. How do other girls have the energy to put makeup on for class every day?

26. My legs are dead.

27. Why did we think being a college athlete was a good idea?

28. Do you think coach will be mad if I have to go pee?

29. I think I peed my pants a little bit during conditioning.

30. Should I wear my hair in a pony-tail, or in a bun?

31. I should probably start eating healthy soon.

32. Only six more practices until the weekend, we can do this.

33. I'd rather be sore for a week straight than climb into this ice bath.

34. They might have beat us, but at least we're still pretty.

35. I can't wait to celebrate our win this weekend.

36. How many hours of sleep did you get? I got 6, it was crazy, I feel so refreshed.

37. I look like such a boy right now.

38. Will you braid my hair?

39. That referee totally rigged the game. We should have won.

40. I think I'd hate being a reg (regular student).

41. It's OK if I eat this since we had conditioning this morning, right?

42. If you're not doing homework, get off the bus Wi-Fi, everybody.

43. These pants fit my legs perfectly but are huge on my waist.

44. I smell so bad right now that I can smell myself.

45. I bet my grades would be so much better if I wasn't an athlete.

46. Coach only gave us, like, one water break during practice. It was horrible.

47. I am so happy that I'm an athlete.

Cover Image Credit: Wikimedia Commons

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I Used To Think Height Didn't Matter, But Maybe It Really Does

I've come to a conclusion

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I've had my fair share of boyfriends in the past. A common theme in my past choices of boys is that they were all an inch or two taller than me or the same height. Now, I am a little on the taller side considering that the average height for a woman in the US is 5 feet 4 inches tall. I'm not saying all the tall boys belong to all the tall girls and the shorter guys should stick with shorter girls, but I do think there might be something behind all this madness.

My reasoning for this is simple: I've been in an amazing relationship with someone who is fairly taller than me. Is this reason totally irrational and have no sort of concrete evidence for this argument? Yes, totally, but hear me out. All my other relationships haven't been this good or even had the potential to be this good. Is it a coincidence that they were all shorter? I think not!

There is absolutely nothing wrong with boys who are under 5'9''. There are some nice ones who probably don't talk to 5 other girls while you're dating, I just never happened to come across one back when I was in the game. I just find it interesting that I've been in a really healthy relationship for awhile now with someone who is over 6 feet tall.

Many amazing relationships have happened between all different types of people, no matter the height. It's just if you are having problems with boys who are under 6 feet, you may have some thinking to do.


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