Before going to college, I read a statistic stating that 11.2% of college students experience some kind of assault on campus. Even after learning about this, I assumed that it was a rare occurrence -- I assumed that due to the large numbers of college students in the country, 11.2% was a low enough percentage that I'd never have to worry about it.

I was wrong.

While I'm not comfortable sharing all the details, I've recently been sharing the following with people I knew I could trust:

During my first semester at school, I went to a party where a boy did things to me that I did not consent to.

Of course, I got questions after I shared my story, ranging from "are you okay?" to "what were you wearing?".

Here are my answers:

1. Are you okay?

As of now, yes. While I was shaken, confused, and afraid during, after, and in the weeks following, I've realized that what happened to me was not my fault and doesn't make me less of a person.

2. Why did it take you so long to come forward?

I was afraid. I didn’t want my parents to know I was out partying, and I didn’t want people to treat me like I was delicate. My assault also occurred around the same time when the UVA Jackie case, in which a girl lied about being violently gang-raped on campus, was still being discussed in the media for ruining the reputations of the falsely accused.

I was scared that most people would immediately think of the false statements from the Jackie case when hearing another story about a girl being assaulted on campus, and I wasn’t sure what to do if accused of lying. I didn’t know the boy’s name, and “Caucasian with brown hair” was a description that applied to hundreds of boys on campus.

3. But weren’t you technically not raped?

Merriam-Webster defines sexual assault as “illegal sexual contact that usually involves force upon a person without consent”. I did not consent to what happened to me.

4. Do you feel like you should dress more conservatively now?

I didn’t dress in an overly exposing manner before I was assaulted, and I’ve continued to dress how I feel comfortable. While I’m not about to walk into class in a bikini, I still feel like I should be able to wear a tank top and shorts if it’s hot out, or a muscle tee and leggings if I’m going to the gym.

5. Are you afraid of men now?

Absolutely not. While I do feel warier if I’m walking home alone at night and I notice someone walking behind me, I’m not scared of men. And besides, the boy who assaulted me doesn’t represent all men.

6. Why do you still go out?

I’m not going to let what happened to me scare me into hiding in my room every weekend. What happened to me didn’t happen because of the party I went to. It happened because someone thought they had the right to access my body, whether I wanted them to or not.

7. What were you wearing?

While this has become a cliché question that assault victims are asked in movies and TV shows, I honestly didn’t expect to hear it. But, for those who are curious, I was wearing a crop top and leggings. Not the most conservative outfit, but also not the most revealing.

And besides, most of the other girls at the party were dressed in a similar way, which lead me to wonder, why me? I wouldn’t wish what happened to me on anyone, but since I was dressed like every other girl, I couldn’t help but wonder what made me a target.

I’m writing this in honor of Sexual Assault Awareness Month. While sexual violence has dropped by half since 1993, people still experience sexual violence every day. At home. At school. In jail. In parking garages. At work. At parties. And it’s time that no one experiences it ever again.