Yes, You Can Be Queer and Christian

You Can Be Queer AND Christian

In case you missed it: I am a lesbian. I am also a Christian. Yes, you can be both.


A few common things that I have heard from various evangelicals after coming out as a lesbian:

"I love you, but I can't accept your lifestyle."

"I support you, despite the sinful lifestyle you choose to live."

"A sin is a sin in Gods' eyes."

"40-years of what I believe won't change based on your choice to be gay".

"Love the sinner, hate the sin."


On Tuesday, February 26th, the United Methodist Church, the second-largest Protestant denomination in America, voted against a proposal that would have let regional and local Methodist churches set their own LGBTQ-inclusive policies. This 449-374 vote upholds the ban on same-sex marriage and prevents LGBTQ clergy from serving in the church.

As someone who has as grown up in a religious household (shout out to my fellow Baptists) and also identifies as a lesbian, the result of this vote breaks my heart.

Before publicly coming out in 2017, I struggled with these two combating aspects of my identity. This community, that church, my family, these people I've grown up with telling me that who I am attracted to and who I love is a sinful, unacceptable way of living.

So, let's dive into discussing this issue from a theological perspective –

Many and most of the Christians that I know oppose the idea of same-sex marriage and LGBTQ+ relationships because of the Biblical framework that is laid out in the famous verses of Leviticus 18.

Leviticus 18:22: "You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination".

Others support their LGBTQ brothers and sisters and their identities only to paint them as a sinful "choice." As if you can choose who you are and are not attracted to like it's the Subway sandwich you're thinking about having for lunch.

In viewing same-sex relationships through a lens colored by these verses in Leviticus, it establishes gay people as having a set problem, being that they want to have sex with the wrong people.

This paints LGBTQ individuals as lustful, sexually driven beings. The religious sect of society hypersexualizes the LGBTQ community to justify what they believe is a gay person's sinful lifestyle. So, while straight people fall in love, get married, and start families, gay people only live for sex? No. You cannot choose who you are attracted to.

Everyone has a sexual orientation – and it isn't just about sex itself.

LGBTQ+ individuals have the exact same capacity and desire for romantic love as straight people do.

Heterosexual relationships are seen as a fundamentally good thing. Straight people are told to avoid things like pornography, lust, casual relationships, and premarital sex, but gay people are told to avoid romantic relationships altogether. I may be gay, but surprisingly I have been in love, I do want to get married, and I will have kids someday.

I am a lesbian, but I didn't choose to be this way. I didn't choose this way not because it is a bad thing; I can now say I am in a place where I am proud of who I am as a gay woman. However, it is challenging, stressful, and somewhat isolating to be different, to not feel understood, and to not be accepted by the people you love the most.

Bottom line: The United Methodist Church and many other churches (my own church home included) from different denominations prevent members of the church body from serving on the basis of who they love.

Hear me out.

Voting down this change, supporting and upholding a ban that prevents people from serving in ministries where they feel like God is calling them is the furthest thing away from living and loving like Jesus.

Love is love is love. In fact, the highest command in the Bible itself is to love.

1 Corinthians 13:13: "So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love." (Pro Tip: 1 Corinthians 13 is an entire chapter about the biblical way of love).

Jesus said it himself –

John 15:12: "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you."

What type of example are we setting if as a church body we denounce, target, and attack an entire community of people on the basis of who they love?

How are we loving and living in a Christ-like fashion is we demonize the love of our LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters as those who are trapped in a "sinful lifestyle"?

Regardless of denomination and church affiliation, I believe the church is stronger and more closely resembles the Kingdom of God when it includes everyone – including LGBTQ+ individuals.

Support your LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters in Christ. You can be an ally of the LGBTQ community and be Christian.

To those of you who struggle with accepting your sexual identity because of persistent discrimination from the religious sect: You are valid, you are loved, you are accepted, and God loves you no matter what.

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If You're A Millennial Christian, You Definitely Have A Relationship With Christ And These 19 Other Things

“Every Christian shall be addicted to La Croix” – John 3:16

1. A lowkey tattoo

Probably on your ankle or wrist. Bonus points if it’s scripture or a cross.

2. Birkenstocks

You’re extra Christian if you wear them with socks.

3. A church camp fling

I don't know if it’s the fellowship or the fact that it’s never really allowed, but Christians LOVE a good camp romance.

4. Extra long Patagonia shorts

Modest is ALWAYS hottest

5. XL shirts (even though you probably would fit into a small)

Shirt or a dress? The world will never know… good thing you have those extra long Patagonia shorts!

6. A thicc study bible

So what if you never actually read the stuff at the bottom? The font is big and the bigger the Bible the closer to heaven, right?

7. Hipster glasses

Because apparently freedom in Christ means freedom from contacts

8. A large collection of Christian books

"Love Does," "Not a Fan," "Redeeming Love," "Popular," and "Everybody Always" are on pre-order. We have them all and copies to give to our friends

9. A nose ring

Just because we are Christians doesn’t mean we can’t be ~edgy~

10. "Jesus Calling"

It likely sits by your bedside table at home, and you read it a few times a year.

11. La Croix

“Every Christian shall be addicted to La Croix.” –John 3:16

12. A Young Life t-shirt

Whether you have dabbled in Young Life or can name all the camps in a single breath, everyone owns one!

13. The skill to create a killer Instagram story

Spending time in the Word = Spending time creating some sick instastories for the followers. Simple.

14. A Jeep, Subaru, or Suburban

Squad rolls up to church in style

15. A deep love for podcasts or a sermon series.

Did someone say The Porch? Elevation? Passion?

16. A one-piece swimsuit

Two types of people in this world: people who try to make a one-piece cute and people who rock the OG Speedo

17. The Church Clap

It’s not a Christian party until the church clap breaks out. The Holy Spirit loves to dance!

18. A social media cleanse

Whether you gave it up for lent or just felt compelled to give it up for a season, everyone has done it. Bonus points if you alerted your followers about it beforehand in a super long post. Bonus bonus points if it ended after a week.

19. Chacos

Single strapped or double. Toe strap or none. We don’t discriminate!

20. A relationship with Jesus Christ

Although it's funny to make fun of the random stuff a lot of Christians do (and don’t do), what really matters is our relationship with Jesus. I know a lot of Christians who don’t fit this stereotype, and that is totally okay! Doing these things isn’t going make you a better Christian, but spending time in the Bible every day will!

Cover Image Credit: Abigail Rose Fuller

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How I Came To The Realization That I Was Bi

Sometimes you don't always know who you are, but when you know, YOU KNOW.


Growing up, I knew that I liked boys and I never had to question that. I remember my first crush, my teen heartthrobs, and even my odd obsession with Brendan Fraser. Maybe it was because I thought that was what I was "supposed" to feel. When you are a little girl, you are constantly asked what boy you had a crush on or if you had a boyfriend. It's like society is embedding in you at a young age that you have only one option.

It wasn't until I got to college that I started to question whether boys were my only choice. It started off like most cliche college movies do, with a party. I saw a girl kiss another girl and I was jealous. I wanted that to be me and I didn't know why. I always thought that girls were pretty but I never thought anything more of it. I never tried to think anything more of it, because I didn't think it was a possibility. Not until that night. You see, you never think something is possible for you until you see people like you doing that thing.

I found my eyes lingering on girls a little bit longer than usual and truly admiring them as I did boys before. At parties, I would make out with girls just for "fun," because that's what everyone did. That was until finally, I met a girl that seemed to really like me. I pursued her, thinking that she actually was interested in me. It was exciting and I was feeling a way that I never felt before. Then after a while, she told me she wasn't really gay and I felt heartbroken, betrayed even. I've never felt the sting of unrequited feelings from a girl before. I knew then that I was bi. I knew that what I felt was real and a few days later, I told my friends and then I told my mom. It felt as though I was finally sure of who I was and what was possible for me in life.

I still struggled with figuring out who I was after that and constantly found myself sliding up and down the sexuality spectrum. Though as a grew older, I realized that it's okay to be bi. It's okay to feel whatever I am feeling because that is me and I am just fine the way I am.

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