Tomorrow is my 25th birthday. Even just typing that now gave me a mini-stroke, but I've accepted, in the weeks leading to this moment, that time does not slow or stop just because I want it to. I used to think I'd be in a completely different place in my life at this point. If you asked me at 18, I would say "married, homeowner, maybe a kiddo on the way" but today, I am none of those things. On the eve of my first year as "vintage," I am only happy, fulfilled, and grateful- no mortgages attached. I can't help but think back to my 20th birthday and realize how my life has culminated into this incredible story in just 5 years. While I encourage everyone reading this to learn your own lessons on this crazy ride called "Life," I thought I would share just a handful of the things I've learned in the first half of my 20s.
Character is built on risk. Everything I know about who I am as a person was acquired in the throws of a risky situation. I packed up my entire life, ended a long term relationship, and moved to a state I had never even visited to live in a city full of strangers. There were a handful of people who likely had bets on how long I would last before I turned around to flee back to the comfort of my small Kansas town. But here I am- nearly 5 years later in a town full of friends living out the dream I had in mind when I decided to take a risk. Don't be afraid to jump- it could be the greatest thrill of your life.
Don’t try to understand love- just understand what love ISN’T. Love isn’t jealousy, greed, insecurity or infidelity. It’s saying “I’m Sorry” when you mess up, and “I forgive you” when you’ve been wronged. It’s not fighting WITH someone, but rather FOR someone. Love is waking up every day and choosing someone regardless of what may have happened the day before and believing that growth comes under pressure. It’s saying “I’m not sure if it's humanly possible to love you more than I did yesterday but today I’m going to try.” It’s understanding your worth is not at the hands of another human but knowing that you’re worth a little bit more when you’re holding their hand. Love can hurt, but it can also heal- and you can't understand it until you experience both.
You are important. Your existence is not an accident and every day is an opportunity to impact more people. Never underestimate the power of a smile and never be afraid to tell yourself "I'm not okay right now- but I'm going to be." Call home often and don't lose contact with your friends over time or over miles. If you feel overwhelmed, you're on the verge of some major blessings and if you feel content, help someone who doesn't.
Finally, don't let life pass you by. Leave home, explore the world, go to that party, and pursue that dream. Give that boy your number, follow your gut, and take lots of pictures. Growing up isn't about following guidelines. It's not about getting married at 24, buying a house at 26, and having kids at 28. Living a life you love every day is the only guideline.
