I am an only child. Growing up I use to be ashamed of that fact. Kids can be cruel, they will find any little thing that makes you different and make fun of you. Growing up, I was the kid that always asked for a sibling, but it was never in the cards for me. Even now, I’ve always wondered how it would have been to grow up with someone who was so much like me, yet different. Someone who would always be there. How it would be to have someone you grew up with, someone who’s seen every little facet, every little nuance, of you up close and personal and still loves you for them. I’ve always wondered what it would have been like to have someone who shares your blood and knows your secrets and your dreams. Someone who knows the stories you’ll never tell another soul because they were right there with you. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to realize it's OK that I’m an only child; it does not mean I’m alone. It has its good sides and bad sides.
Pros:
1. You are super close to your parents.
This is pretty obvious. Growing up they are the only ones around. You become closer to them, since everything you do it’s just you and them. You get your parents full attention, which makes you even closer. This may not be the best if you are a little more rebellious, but have to remember that your parents are always there for you.
2. You grow up more independent, mature and get along better with adults.
This is something that will set you apart from your peers while also making it easier for you in the future. Growing up since you are alone, all decisions are all on you. You don’t have someone there to help decided something. You grow up entertaining yourself and spending a lot of time around adults. This teaches you how to interact with people much older than yourself and how to act, which increases your maturity a lot further than that peers.
Cons:
1. Loneliness.
Loneliness is one of the hardest things to overcome, as a child and a grown up is the feeling of being alone. I’m still struggling with this today. But being an only child has given me a little better insight into living alone. When you tell someone you are an only child this is usually the first thing they think of because it’s true. Only children spend a lot of time alone, not really anything they can do about that. This better prepares us for the future when we have to be alone, but no way does it make it easier.
2. Being called spoiled.
This was (and let's face it, sometimes still is) the hardest thing for me growing up. Friends with siblings don’t understand that you aren’t spoiled, you don’t get everything you want, and your parents don’t give you everything you ask for. A lot of what you have is stuff you’ve worked for, stuff your parents wanted you to have and stuff that you’ve earned. Growing up you got the best stuff, because parents want their children to have the best of life, and as an only child it’s easier for them to afford the best. But there is no way to explain this to someone else who is not an only child. As an adult now, I’ve just come to accept the term and embrace it.
I don’t regret being an only child, I don’t think less of my parents or of anyone else. While sometimes when I see friends with siblings and how close they are, I still have a small part of me hoping to share that with someone. I think back on my childhood and how happy I was. And how much closer I am to my parents now. I love my family, my extended family I have made and my friends, that would probably not be true if I weren’t an only child.
