Who do you see yourself as? How do you self-identify? When coming across this topic, it is arduous to not cross the delicate border dividing narcissism and loathe. No one wants to get stuck treading the mucky waters of acknowledging his or her own imperfections and perks. It is a very dangerous yet awkward experience. So how the heck do we look reality in the eyes, and confirm the good and bad without sounding too cocky or self-destructive? From personal experience, I fell victim to degrading my whole character while mistaking it for humility. Whenever someone complimented a quality I obtain, I instantly refuted, shot down, or reversed the positive remark to the other person. Why is it so difficult to just accept it, receive it, and say "thank you"? By being so impulsive to negate a kind opinion, it instantly closes the opportunity for truth. In other words, we stunt our own growth. We become stagnant and stiff in self-confidence; this is a danger zone. When it comes the time to look in the mirror, we cannot see our true reflection because it's broken. Instead of seeing who we actually are, we are staring at a fractured image that we helped smash. When we're in this vulnerable state, it is an open invite to the Enemy to orchestrate greater ruckus. When we bring ourselves down, it is Satan's hobby to kick us and destroy us. Considering we get so caught up in the routine of stamping every piece of truth of our living being as false, we become numb to compliments. This is even put into play when we need words of affirmation the most. When we're feeling low, empty, dry, and alone, where did all the compliment-givers go? Imagine someone telling you a fact every day, and your response to them was simply a shake of the head and a "nope". The fact-giver would probably start to question the integrity of the assertion. Eventually, after getting turned down consistently, they stop coming to you to share the good news. So what's a good lesson from breaking this habit? Well, there are two things. The first being, stop giving Satan permission to tear you down. It's so easy to believe the lies of:
- I am inadequate
- I am unlovable
- I am not attractive enough
- I am not good enough
- I am not strong enough
- I am not smart enough
- I am a failure
- I am lonely
- I am fat
- God has forgotten me
Fist of all, do you know who "I Am" is? It's something bigger than ourselves -- that's for sure. Well in Exodus 3:14, "And God said unto Moses, I Am That I Am. That is right folks! The Most High God identifies as the Great I Am. How does this apply to you? Look above at all the lies we profess over ourselves on a daily basis. You are doing more damage than you intend. When you say "I am...dumb", "I am...ugly", that is a smack in the LORD's face. Ouch. Even though that was a very short list of things, believe me when I say the list goes on. Most of all, believe me when I say all lies come straight from the pit of hell. Yes, hell is real. Yes, Satan is real, and he is the father of lies. Since we know this, what does that say about you when you believe and even speak these untruths? John 8:44 says, "You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father he was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies."
Whoa, whoa, whoa. So the Word calls us a child of the Devil?! Sheesh. What a huge degrade from being a child of the Most High God. There is clearly no truth found in Satan. That means, when we deny the truth that people speak to us about ourselves, or when we break ourselves down, we simply stand with the father of lies. And trust me, he will thoroughly enjoy gripping your wrist and utilizing it to forcefully punch your tight fist to the mirror -- your reflection. When it's time to find your treasured qualities, you cannot seem to find them. They are lost. Just like the people who spent their time building you up. You are lost. Which leads to my second and final lesson.
How do we repair our fractured identity? A greater question is, who would sacrifice their precious time, picking up the millions of pieces? Right, when there's no hope of seeing this image being restored, you blink and it's all back together. Colossians 2:9-10, "For in Him dwelleth all the fullness of the Godhead bodily. And ye are complete in Him, which is the head of all principality and power". This is saying that the One, who has all authority, has the power to make us whole. That's a right folk! We are only complete in Him. Sure, you feel good when other people try to tell you who you are, but people can change their minds and fall through with commitment. Therefore, it is smart and safe to put your identity in something that never ever changes. "Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and today, and forever," (Hebrews 13:8).
Do you understand that we are looking for people to define our worth? Sure, having nice friends who show you the love language of "words of affirmation" is comforting, but how can we depend on someone else who is also incomplete and lost? The good news is: we are all made in the image of the Most High God. Yeah, of course, we have heard this countless times, but how many times have we come to know the importance of it in our heart? You, my friend, are made in the likeness of the King of all Kings. Reiterating what was mentioned earlier, He has all power and is head of all principalities. And you're saying we're made after Him? Exactly. That must mean you're pretty darn special. Additionally, He is Truth. So when we begin to believe in Him, we believe in Truth. Now you say:
- I am more than adequate
- I am lovable
- I am attractive enough
- I am good enough
- I am strong enough
- I am smart enough
- I am not a failure
- I am not lonely
- I am not fat
- God has not forgotten me
By speaking and following this truth, you bring glory to the Most High, and you feel more confident in your identity in Him. When you are feeling insufficient, weak, and or confused about whom you are, always remember that you are found and made complete through our Loving and Beautiful Savior.
