For as long as I can remember, there has always been a stigma on students that don't do well in school. When I was in elementary school, they handed out these awards that were signed by then President George W. Bush for an outstanding academic record. I was one of the students that received one of those awards, although I have no idea how in the world I had managed to achieve such a feat: I wasn't dumb by any sense of the word, but I didn't go home every single night and study until 5 a.m. to achieve a perfect score on my spelling test. Sixth through ninth grade was sort of the prepping ground for competition; not everyone was obsessed with their grades, but there were a few students that took advantage of the fact that they were receiving special privileges from teachers just because they were perceived as "smart."

I always wanted to be a part of the enrichment program. It infuriated me year after year that the same students would be selected to go to the specially assigned room and get to use their brain power when they were scheduled for "enrichment." Basically, the way it worked was, if you were selected to be in enrichment, you were seen as the best of the best. No one else had access to that room except the few students that "worked for it." Apparently, having a nervous breakdown every night because you'll never be as smart as the Valedictorian of your class doesn't count. I worked my ass off, but since I wasn't seen as a "smart" kid, I wasn't allowed to bite into their forbidden fruit, and that really made me angry.

Academic competition is what is fueling public schools. I have heard time and time again that "they're number one in their class, so they're happy," or "they made it into Honor Society!" Perhaps it's just me being bitter, because I never really understood the concept of high school; why force random subjects on kids that they don't really like paying attention to? I thrived in History, Foreign Languages and English. Math and science, not so much. In fact, I would dread going into a math class every single day, because I knewthat I was going to be the one student that didn't understand anything. My calculus teacher, second semester of senior year, made me bawl my eyes out every time we had a test or when I didn't understand something; because she probably didn't perceive me as "smart," or because I was "different," she automatically put a label on me because math just wasn't my thing.

As I'm a Junior in college now, I still see the academic competition. Right now, I'm rockin' a solid B average GPA. Then why do I see myself comparing my grades to the grades of people that I know inhigh school?Or in different majors? I get so many glares and scoffs when I tell people that I'm studying four different subjects at once: English, Spanish, Women and Gender Studies and Black Studies. They tell me that I'm going to be in college forever, or that I'm wasting my time studying these things, because I'll never be able to apply these concepts to anything in my life, let alone get a job.

So why is there so much stigma and competition when it comes to academics? Do students put too much pressure on themselves to get a 4.0 GPA? Let me tell you something:It doesn't matter. What matters is the experience you get from life and the friendships and memories you make, not textbooks and GPAs. Peace.