The Power Of Validation Is More Important Than You Could Ever Imagine

The Power Of Validation Is More Important Than You Could Ever Imagine

Differences in goals shouldn't mean disregarding someone else's dreams and desires.


Facebook post Liz Bertorelli Public Facebook Post.;=1583528030&set;=a.1716976535923&source;=48

One of the things I've talked about with my therapist is how difficult my life has been because as a child I was always told I couldn't do anything I wanted to do when I grew up. There was no encouragement; no sitting down and mapping out how I would achieve my dreams.

Though I never had the dream to be a Princess when I grew up, had I received this kind of encouragement for being a writer, maybe I would've had more success in the literary field.

I feel like people take the power of validation for granted. A certain relentless and fearless powers come from being denied, but the different kind of power, the courage, and inspirational powers come from being cheered on.

Believing in someone else's dream also takes respect. You have to respect someone else's path before you encourage it. Otherwise, it just feels like patronization.

In this world of feminism showing women that they don't need men to complete them, there are still a few of us who want the Disney Princess love stories we were raised on. For someone to show respect by advocating the empowering of the wishes of a little girl who voices this desire is extremely commendable.

I see too many dreams like this dashed in current times because one person follows a more traditional path than someone else wanted to. I think its okay to live in a society where some want to be princesses and princes and others want to be activists and social justice warriors. All these paths of life are valid and should be treated with respect from all sides.

Living in a world where everyone is exactly the same and are all working toward the same goal would be a true zombie apocalypse. I mean think about it: an entire world of women completely disregarding men so they won't be patronized and taken care of would not only stop the population from expanding, but I feel like it would drive men to behave even more violently due to frustration — which would end the human race altogether!

I also loved the post shared above because as someone who is more traditional than not, I see a lot of disrespect aimed at these kinds of dreams and desires. I see massive disrespect thrown at anyone who is Christian, anyone who is Catholic, anyone who is Muslim, anyone who wants to be married, anyone who is pro-life, anyone who is monogamous, and just anyone who wants or practices ANYTHING traditional in or from life.

Now, I don't see traditionalism with rose colored glasses. One can definitely find harmful ideologies in everything that I've listed. However, disrespecting someone's history, beliefs, culture, and/or spirituality just because it's traditional is frankly just a shitty thing to do. I feel like I have just a much right to exist as those who are nontraditional.

Can you imagine how crushed the hypothetical daughter from the original post would have been if she'd been told how unrealistic her dream was? How she should want something better for herself than just being some princess? By showing her dream respect, an entire world of possibilities has opened up for her — whether she grows up a traditionalist or nontraditional. May more people start to respect the traditional dreams and desires of the world, as well as nontraditional.

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Why Getting Away From Where You Grew Up Is Important

College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

As you get older, life sometimes makes it hard for you to take control and go to the places you've only dreamed of. There's always a work meeting, ballet recital, or something to hold you back from taking that trip planned four summers ago. College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

It's important to get away from everything you know at one point in your life. There is a whole world full of risk, chance, and experience. The security you have in your hometown can be traded in for adventure and change. There's a time to try something new, learn something that blows your mind, or go somewhere that takes your breath away. That time is now, to feel like you are actually doing something worthwhile with your life.

It is important to get away from where you have grown up for some of your life. You need to grow on your own, without anyone there to tell you you're wrong or out of line being a certain way. The transition from high school to college is the gift of independence. You choose who you get to be without anyone holding your past against you. It's a do-over, a second chance after the mistakes and regrets you lived through in high school. Yet, being away from home has its drawbacks as you lose familiar faces, a steady schedule, and many creature comforts. But, all of these can be found in a new place with time. Leaving the place you grew up gives you another chance to grow again, without boundaries. Travel whenever you get an opportunity because it may not come again. Test your limits while living your actual dreams. Go out and explore the world—you're only here once and don't have time to take it for granted. Leaving everything you know sounds scary, but there are great memories to be made out there.

Whether this new place for you is two hours from home, or 20, it's different, it's exciting and it's change. It is important to get away from where you grew up and learn from the adventures you embark on. It is the best way to find yourself and who you want to be. It's what you'll remember when you look back on everything you've done.

Cover Image Credit: Madison Burns

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Poetry On Odyssey: It's Still Crazy To Think

Destiny or choice? Maybe somewhere in between.


It's still crazy to think

where it all started.

Literally every decision,

big and small, parted

my paths to run into you

that fateful night.

You were in plain sight

but I could never see

how much a moment

would change me.

It's still crazy to think

about the honeymoon stage

where each month

was celebrated like a new phase.

We tried to impress the other

and thought we had it all together.

We were blind to each other's flaws

but that was the beauty in it all.

It's still crazy to think

about those three years

nine-hundred miles apart

hundreds of letters to mend hearts

The beauty of being together

the sting of another goodbye

But we always chose to stay

in hopes of better days.

It's still crazy to think

How much we have grown

two teens exploring the unknown

to college kids venturing on their own

giddy feelings and hard days,

our dreams and aspirations have changed

but our choice to love has not.

And when I read those old love letters

stacked high in a secret place

I can't help but appreciate

our tarnished and imperfect story

that led us to this moment

in it's glory

of looking into your eyes.

And nothing that lies

behind us or before us matters

Because you are here.


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