Poetry on Odyssey: Change

Poetry on Odyssey: Change

There are 365 days to create a new story. What will yours say?

57
views

Change is coming

can you feel it?

The goosebumps coating your skin like armor.

The awakening within you.

Change is coming

can you hear it?

The whistle in the wind through the trees.

The little voice in your head reminding you of who you are.

Change is coming

can you see it?

The colors of the leaves as they dance to the frosted ground

reds, oranges, and even pinks.

Your reflection in the mirror showing you how beautiful you are.

Change is coming

can you smell it?

The smell of a bonfire as you drive with the windows down.

Change is upon us

Spread your arms wide and embrace it.

Popular Right Now

To The Woman That Had A Miscarriage

It’s okay to not be okay.

76
views

One in four known pregnancies end in a miscarriage.

One in four.

If this is so common, why don't more people talk about it?

Because miscarriage is hard.

It is painful...so painful.

It is exhausting.

It is emotional.

It is personal.

It is devastating.

It is intimate.

It is heartbreaking.

It can destroy a woman more than anyone could ever imagine. We question why our body wasn't good enough, or healthy enough, or strong enough. We can't stop thinking about things we could have done differently to save our baby, even if there was a way possible that we could. We doubt our ability to be a good mother, since we couldn't even carry our baby to term. We are overwhelmed with fear that it's going to happen again...and again.

Saying that miscarriage is hard, is an understatement. So why, as women, do we choose not to talk about it? We talk about all the other hard things in life, especially about fertility issues, but why not about miscarriages? Maybe it's because we are scared of the bad things in life actually happening to us. Maybe it's because we don't know what to do with our emotions once that bad thing happens. Maybe it's because we don't want to accept that these things do happen to good people. Maybe it's because we just set aside our feelings when horrible things occur in our lives. Maybe it's because no one is talking about it.

Miscarriage itself is a roller coaster. Most often, the time between finding out you're pregnant, to the time you actually miscarry, is extremely short. In a matter of a few days, you can go from being overwhelmed with excitement and nervousness, to feeling broken and beat down. Your body goes from an over abundance of hormones, to zero. Your mind fills up with crazy amount of thoughts, and then overflows with conflicting emotions. Your heart goes from being the most full you ever could have imagined it to be, to being so broken. Nothing on this planet could ever prepare a woman for a miscarriage - because for some reason, it's just not something women want to talk about.

It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to be a strong woman and not be okay because of the devastation caused by a miscarriage. What's not okay, is not talking about it. Be more open to talking about the difficult things, because you might be peacefully surprised to find that someone else went through what you just unfortunately experienced. You'll have so many questions, you'll ask why, you'll want to ball your eyes out, you’ll want to scream in sadness, because it's hard, trust me baby girl it is so hard - but being a strong woman sometimes isn't enough for our hearts to heal properly from a miscarriage. Find comfort and peace in talking to friends and family members that may have experienced a miscarriage, because having a miscarriage is a feeling like no other, and talking through it could be the best way to heal our broken hearts from a pain as hard as this. Our husbands won’t ever truly understand what our bodies go through - as much as they want and try to understand, the truth is they never will. And that's okay, because they were not meant to fully understand. Nothing could ever even remotely prepare a woman to experience a miscarriage, but finding comfort in being more open with the ones close to you about experiencing miscarriages could ease some of that devastating pain. Talk about the hard things, talk about miscarriages, talk about infertility issues. Because you don't always have to be a strong woman. To the woman who had a miscarriage - it’s okay to not be okay.

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Please Know That Being Diagnosed With PCOS Is Not The Same As Living With It

I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2018, but it wasn't until months later that I realized what it’s actually like living with it everyday.

65
views

In October 2017, tired of counting calories and never seeing the scale move, I decided to try the latest fad diet: Keto.

It worked.

I lost almost 40 pounds in half the time it had taken to lose 20. I had lost nearly 10 inches from waist and hips. I went from a size 18 to a size 12.

Getting into ketosis was hard, but once I was there, I felt incredible: better mental clarity and focus, astronomical amounts of energy, regular body functions. Don't get me wrong, this diet is hard. No carbs, no colorful vegetables, no pasta. The struggle was real. But what it was doing for my body was worth it.

Except for one little thing: my periods had lost their minds. I'm talking bleeding for three weeks straight, no break. Coming and going in particular pattern, sometimes twice a month. Side note: this is not normal. In the world of Keto, it's supposed to help exponentially with fertility and hormone balances; people use this diet as a way to reverse hormone imbalances, PCOS, and infertility. This was virtually unheard of in all of my support groups.

Months and months go by with no relief. My doctor can't figure out why everything is so wonky. She takes me off the pill and things get better - slightly. Any improvement at this point was a victory.

She finally gets my ultrasounds back and she says "Well that's a surprise!" Cue my questioning look of confusion. "Umm care to share?" "Your ovaries have the characteristic look of PCOS. But you don't have any of the usual symptoms. I'm guessing the Keto diet was helping in it's own way. I recommend staying on the diet, let nature re-regulate your natural hormones, and we will re-evaluate in a few months."

I was frustrated, but this was totally do-able. I had been living this lifestyle for months, so I didn't foresee it as an issue. But then my kidneys starting reacting to the diet, and that doctor recommended I come off it. Obviously I wasn't going to jeopardize my health, so I started a low carb version of the Mediterranean diet.

I went in fully expecting to gain some weight back, because I was reintroducing carbs when I had gone largely without them for over a year. I knew that this would happen, and I didn't let myself get discouraged when the scale started going forward.

What I did not expect was to have my PCOS start running lose with my entire life and sanity.

Don't get me wrong — my periods were normal again, but everything else went AWOL. My hormones were going up and down of their own volition, we are talking sobbing hysterically over a butterfly commercial one minute and then fuming with anger over a car ad the next.

I started experiencing pelvic pain that feels like cramps only not all the time and without rhyme or reason.

My hair became uncontrollably oily to the point where I had to wash it everyday like clockwork; it started to thin and fall out.

I also started getting darker hair everywhere. I'm naturally an incredibly fair-skinned person so having black hair anywhere stands out like a sore thumb.

I felt like I wasn't in control of anything going on with my body. I felt like a hairy, unattractive monster. Everything that made me feel attractive and desirable was slowly being taken away from me piece by piece.

I had been living with PCOS for nearly six months, but I hadn't realized what it was like to actually live with it. I thought it was just irregular periods, but it is so much more than just a weird period.

I went back to the doctor, and she explained to me again how PCOS works, and how she didn't think traditional treatment options were the best thing for me. "Go back on the Keto diet. You were having incredible success with managing your symptoms. Go back to that."

Going back has not been easy. When I first started Keto, it wasn't easy, but I got into it quickly. I've been trying since January 12th to get back into it, and it hasn't worked.

I'm now in a place where I need to do it — for my health, for my sanity, for my self-esteem — and I physically can't. I do exactly everything the same as before, and it's not working. I'm trying to move away from the mentality of doing it for weight loss, and move toward positive thinking about how it's what's best for my body and my health.

My PCOS has forced me to have militant control over everything I eat. I can't simply enjoy food anymore. Everything that I chose to eat directly relates back to my PCOS and what that particular food can do for me. I think about everything that I put into my body, and the potential it has for either healing my body or harming it.

I see a piece of cake and I smell it, and picture in my mind what it tastes like. But I know that if I eat that piece of cake, I will bloat, get a stomach ache, and have to start back from square one the next day.

I cut out the carbs. I say no to cake. No potatoes. No pasta. I eat only green vegetables. I drink coffee that has nothing but heavy cream. I try to do intermittent fasting for 15 hours a day.

And I hope that it works. I hope that today will be the day I can get my life back on track. That today will be the day Keto works its magic.

I hope.

Related Content

Facebook Comments