Poetry On Odyssey: Here I Am

I feel like there comes a time when you reflect on yourself. You reflect so deeply you find it hard to say it out loud, but you feel it inside of you. Recently reflecting on the little girl I used to be. You know recently seeing a little girl brings me to tears because it makes me tell this little girl, who I portray as me, telling myself how strong I have come to be.

And that I wish I could go back and lift that little girl's face, wipe all her tears, crush all those lies, and show her that she has more inside of her than she hears and believes. This is a battle. A battle between the mask that the little girl clutched to, and the human that is waiting to finally say goodbye and find her life inside the heart that was waiting for it to have a chance to speak.

Here I Am

I'm going to be honest with myself this time

even though it feels comfortable to hide inside

And believe all those lies

I'm finally breaking out of my shell this time

And not be afraid of what comes through to the outside

Little girl here I am

I see you sitting there

Listening to music and having those headphones tangled in your hair

Thinking you're not worth it

and no one truly cares

I know your environment isn't healthy

and you don't want to say to them you have anxiety

or you struggle with depression

Cause you don't want to accept it

God forbid you let it slip and make them feel like you're a disappointment

So that's what you did, and now you feel you can't escape it

I know every friend you make it's scary

then you attach so easily

cause they give you what you need

But you are afraid one day they may leave

Cause what if they catch a glimpse and hate the real me

Just put that mask on they won't notice

they have other friends, you're nothing compared their normality

Little girl here I am

I know you don't love yourself

and you try to find you in someone else

just restart, smile, laugh it all out

The arguments will end soon

Just stay strong don't fall through

I know right now those thoughts is all you know

you put on a brave face for the show

Little girl please let go

Let go of all the negativity, and self doubt and pity, and the "you'll never be important to me."

you've heard from the monster that tried to mold you into saying that's who you will be

Little girl pick up your face and watch me explain

that you will have to journey through this never-ending chase

but I came back to tell you that you will win this game

It will be full of disastrous feelings to tackle through

but never underestimate the strength you have in you

You will have to go through a lot of feelings and change

but let me tell you it will be okay

you will get through it day by day.