Poetry on Odyssey: My Best Works

Poetry on Odyssey: My Best Works

Hopefully someone, somewhere will get something out of this.

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Hello friends, welcome to the most intimate part of me: my poetry. Here lies my best poems, the ones that express my emotions and hardships the most. Hopefully someone, somewhere will get something out of this.

Anxiety is a Hand

There's a hand wrapped around my neck, yet to squeeze,

but I know that it is coming from deep inside of me.
It's threatening to tighten, to close away my air,
shutting my eyes firmly as I try not to care.
The anticipation of it keeps me on my toes,
Where it suddenly came from? Nobody knows.
The feeling of anxiousness and close proximity takes me down under,

racking my head for ways to calm down, still so full of wonder.
Out of nowhere the hand begins to clasp around my neck,
tears streaming down my face because I'm unable to keep my feelings in check. The balloon within starts expanding as it fills up my entire being,
feeling so crowded and helpless, a blank page in my mind is all I'm seeing.

The Dress

Confidence became scraped, became abused.
And then came the splotches of brown and blue, forming every bruise.
Each risqué comment is a strike to the heart,
Building and building until I fall apart.
I hide beneath baggy clothes,
desperately trying to erase what everybody knows.
Ivory skin with bumps and curves,
Forgetting all that I deserve.
I became eye candy, not worth anything more,
Tears running down my face as I ask, "What am I good for?"
The mirrors up my skirt, the click of the camera as I walk by,
The iPad on my backside and a hand grazing my thigh.
The lump forming in my throat as I can't help but cry.
Each piling on top as I ask God why.
With every dress I buy comes shame,
The clothing that takes my figure and puts it in a frame.
It highlights my assets and makes me feel good,
but as I look in the mirror, I ponder on buying the dress and how I could.
It would put on display what people only see when they look at me,
holding me captive, never allowing me to be free.
so I throw the dress in my closet and I continue to hide,
hoping people will finally notice me for everything that's on the inside.

Slowly Erased

and I start the process as I slowly erase every part of you from my life—

from every text message you've ever sent me to every photo on my phone.

earrings left in my jewelry box, untouched,

items collecting dust beneath my bed.

I close my eyes and I try to shut you out.

I try to shut out every moment you made me smile,

i try to shut out every moment you made me feel the slightest bit alive or

the slightest bit h a p p y.

I try to ignore the pang in my heart at the very sound of your name

or the sound of a song playing on the radio that somehow ties back to you.

because even though i haven't seen you in days,

i see you everywhere i go.

i see you on the couch at the coffee shop we used to go to

i see you in my bed in my room

i see you in the simplest things

and i see you in the simplest of places.

i close my eyes and i try to make you go away.

i try to forget the way you made me feel.

because even though my head knows all the bad,

my heart wants to focus on all the good.

and even though we weren't meant to me,

and even though we're better off apart,

i can't deny the fact that you'll always be in my h e a r t.


Fire


you are my fire.
you spread heat through me as
I breathe in your oxygen.
you are my fuel
that causes the fire to burn brighter.

yet even as you stir up each flame,
you're able to extinguish it
the moment I melt into your arms—
yet bring it back to life the moment
my lips find yours.

perhaps the falling was the spark
that brought each flame to life

perhaps the aftermath;
the being—
was the smoldered fire,
calm, yet radiating heat,
quiet, with potential to roar again

The Garden

A garden sprouted in her heart and she grew,

each petal splashed with color, color without you.

Her leaves were her wings and she

learned how to fly,

she was stunted when she said hello, yet

soared when she said goodbye.

The Storm Cloud

Falling for you was like a storm cloud. Rain filled the soft cotton, refusing to spill, refusing to give in. It continued to build and build until one day, it burst.

And as it burst, drops fell from the sky unforgivingly; endlessly. It was a force unable to be stopped. It was a force unable to be broken.

Rain surrounded me, drops brushing against my skin the same way your fingers have so many times before. It nourished me, it brought me to life.

And as I stood there with my eyes closed so tight, I cried out into the night.

"Please hold me tight and never let me go, for you are the water and you help me grow."

The Tide

It washes over me in the way the tide washes over my toes.
The pit in my stomach feels endless, feels heavy.
And in my throat, I feel stopped up.
I can't breathe it in. I can't digest it.
It's like putting glasses on for the first time and finally being able to see clearly. But when I look in the mirror, I don't like the way I look. I worry others won't like the way it looks, either.
So I take the glasses off and I hide them.
And even though they're out of sight, the throbbing in my chest still remains.
The unsettlement in my stomach doesn't lift.
I push it down until one day, I become the glasses.
I hide myself.

Clone

Full of fear, full of doubt,

Unwanted feelings with no way out.

You write "Not good enough" on the mirror, letting it seep into your brain,

You're feeling adequate, you're going insane.

You base your value off what others think and how others view you,

Every negative comment sticking to you like glue.

Now every time you look in the mirror, that's all you see,

You don't listen to those who tell you over and over again that they disagree.

You don't know your true worth.

You don't know how beautiful you really are.

Even with every bump on your skin and even with all your scars.

You're beautiful when your hair is a mess, and when your makeup isn't on,

However, you don't feel that way. All you want is to be another one of society's spawns.

Maybe then they'll leave you alone,

but only if you're one of Barbie's clones.



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I'm Proud To Be The Girl That Cares 'Too Much'

Hearing someone tell you that you care too much, instinctively makes you want to figure out how to not care as much... I am the girl who thinks about everyone

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If you aren't one, you know one. That one girl who cares about everyone, even if they are toxic to her. That one girl who would give the shirt off her back to a stranger walking down the street. The girl who wouldn't think twice about loaning you money, even though you still owe her from the last time you asked. The girl who will stay up with you until 5 in the morning, talking about the guy who broke your heart. Even though she has work at 8 and you would shut off your phone if she tried calling you past 10 p.m.

I am that girl.

I am the girl that cares too much.

I am the girl that tries too hard to make other people happy. I am the girl that puts everyone else's problems above my own. I am the girl that cares too much about what other people think. I am the girl who cares too much about pleasing everyone around here. And there's something I want everyone to know...

I am the girl who cares too much and I'm happy that way.

While I have stopped caring so much of other people's opinions and pleasing everyone, I still care about others probably more than I need to. I've learned that I cannot make everyone happy and with that, my own personal happiness has grown. I have started to put myself above others, but I will never lessen the amount of love and attention I give to those around me.

I will never stop being there for anyone who needs me. I will never stop being the girl who cares too much.

I love being the girl that cares too much.

Because while many are out there, happy as can be that they get left alone, I love being the girl that people feel comfortable turning to. I love being the friend that others feel they can call if they are stuck or just need someone to talk to.

I've learned that I should never put someone else's happiness above my own. Meaning, I should never sacrifice what makes me happy, to please someone else. If someone is a vegetarian or vegan, that's great for them. But I won't stop eating meat just to make them happy. If someone doesn't like country music, that's fine. I'm not going to stop jamming to Cat Country on my way to work.

Caring too much isn't a bad thing. In a world where nobody seems to care, I'm glad that I do. I could never imagine having the "dgaf" attitude. It's just not in my nature.

So while you can sit there and say, "you care too much." I will happily smile back at you and say "someone needs to."


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College Girls, You NEED To Know These 8 Tips To Stay Safe From Human Trafficking

It could save your life.

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There are more human slaves today than ever before in history. Most people are unaware of how serious this issue is getting.

Many businesses are involved in human trafficking; there could be one right down the road from your house, school or college campus and you are not aware.

College girls are the main target for human traffickers. Not to scare you, but there could be one right down the road from your campus. It's important for you to be aware and stay safe.

1. Don't go anywhere that you are uncertain of.

There is a small business in my college town that is involved in human trafficking and I just found this out last week. If I didn't find out, then there is a possibility that I would have gone there in search of something to do.

2. Never go anywhere alone; always have a walking buddy.

Being a college student, I know how scary it can be walking to class or anywhere else in the dark. You constantly look behind you to see if anyone is following you; you have your mace in one hand and your phone in the other, ready to go. It is always a good thing to have a walking buddy just in case something does happen. It is less likely for something to happen when you are with someone than if you were alone.

3. Be careful with what you post on social media.

Human traffickers have been finding girls by looking at social media. Never post personal information or your whereabouts.

4. If someone throws eggs at your car while driving, don't stop

Human traffickers have been sitting on the side of the road waiting for cars to go by. When they do, they throw eggs at your windshield so that you'll stop your car and get out to look. If you try to use your windshield wipers to get rid of the egg, it will just spread over your windshield making it very hard to see so don't do it! If you pull over or get out of your car, they will jump you and try to take you away.

5. If you find a white bag on your car, don't take it off. Just drive away.

Human traffickers have been sitting in parking lots or along the streets waiting for people to come out to see a bag on their car. People are curious, so their first instinct is to take the bag off to look inside. When you do this, the traffickers will quickly grab you and you won't have a chance to get away. So do yourself a favor and just get into your car and drive away.

6. If you get a text saying someone complimented you, don't reply.

Human traffickers use this technique to get your location without you knowing. Once you click on the links or reply to the message it gives them the opportunity to hack your phone so that they can track it. They will find your location and follow you until they get the chance to jump you. It is in your best interest to just delete the text message.

7. Red slips on your windshield? Ignore it.

Human traffickers use this technique the same way they use the bag technique. They have been placing these red slips on windshields of cars so that you will get out and inspect it. Once you inspect it, they will come and snatch you up. Just ignore it and drive away.

8. Be aware of your surroundings.

When you leave your house, college dorm, store, etc. be aware of who and what is around you. There have been reports of women being followed in Walmart with their kids. There are multiple men following these women everywhere they go in the store. When they check out, there are men around and behind them in the line, also in the next line over. Be careful and make the manager or any of the staff know what is going on.

Report any of these findings to the police right away. Human trafficking needs to stop. Please keep yourself, friends and family safe.

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