Be the girl I never notice.

Stay in the background

and love me from afar.

As I fall for your best friend.

When she breaks my heart

pick up my pieces

and put me back together as you confess

your love for me

and I look in your eyes

and tell you

you’re just a friend.

Be my Ramona Flowers.

Ignore my past

of heartbreaks and desperation.

I’ll fight your seven evil exes

if you dye

your hair every two weeks.

Overcome your insecurities

and I’ll learn the power of self-respect.

Your independent and don’t need me,

but love me, even though

I cheated on you that one time.

Be my oriental Mary Jane

and we can piss off

all the racist fans.

Our first kiss will be after

saving your life, while reinforcing

the damsel in distress stereotype.

Let’s get married as you abandon

your potential and become a Parker.

We can have mixed little babies

with dark skin and long black hair.

Be my stay at home mom

cause sorry Hun, justice calls.