We women often get a bad rep in the world. The haters calling us emotional, dramatic and even crazy! Now I don’t know about you, but I certainly am not crazy. However, I have had my fair share of emotional meltdowns, overdramatic reactions, and crazy comebacks. It is important to note that these cringe-worthy responses did not appear from my everyday stream of conscious. I was provoked dammit. You mess with any woman, you press that particular button, and I can promise that you will awaken their inner crazy bitch.
In my experience, the provoking typically comes from three main sources — your girlfriends, your family, and men. Your gal pals might be your ride or dies, but they know your inner psychopath better than anyone. Which means they know exactly how to bring her out. Same goes with the family — it truly is the best example of a love-hate relationship, you either want to hug them or kill them. The redeeming element of a friend or family throw down is that these humans are going to love you no matter what. So once you calm down, buy your girlie a bottle of wine or give your mama a hug, and of course, say you’re sorry — 98% of the time you’ll be in the clear.
Where things get questionable is when you introduce the inner psycho to a man. I will tell you right now that your inner crazy bitch will 100% scare any dude that isn’t your dad or brother. This is pretty bad news for normal you because unless the kind gentlemen suitor is in love with you, he’s probably a goner. Most guys will not stick around for crazy town — and honestly, can we blame them? This sucks, I know. The "shameover" will be real and wine is highly recommended at this point of the post-psycho process.
Once you come to terms with the situation and quite maturely decide to rack it up as an L, it is now time to pull on your big girl pants and move on. The best thing you can do now is to dust yourself off and promptly get back in the saddle. The worst thing you could possibly do is either to wallow in your misery or continue to be crazy.
Wallowing includes letting some dumb, probably drunk, crazy thing you did get you down (for more than maybe a few hours, because I’m sure he was cute, you need a li'l time to grieve the loss). More crazy includes calling or texting him — more than once and only to say you’re sorry, following him around when you go out, or god forbid ladies… do not go to his home. He’s seen the dark side, now set him free. Much better to swiftly leave him in your dust while you rise from the ashes.
The key to a successful crazy-town rebound is to legit act like a spy. Be smart, quick, stealthy, and sexy. You want to act thoughtfully, you’ve made a fool of yourself, but it is not the end of the world. The less you acknowledge it and resume your normal, everyday behavior the better. If you get into a situation where the man might be a variable, be smart about your actions and proceed with caution. You do not have to dodge him or avoid him, just be smart. Also be quick in picking yourself up and moving on.
The longer you drag it out, the worse your meltdown or psycho actions look and the worse you’ll feel (for quite honestly no reason). Be stealthy in your recovery — while you don’t want to “dodge” him, if you see him regularly or used to sit by him in class all the time (depending on the severity of the situation) you might wanna avoid that for a bit. And finally, turn up the flame a couple notches and knock his socks off. The next time he sees you, look absolutely fire. And for your own damn good, the next day look sexy just for the hell of it! Really helps with personal morale.
Remember throughout all of this that it really is not that big of a deal. We all do it. It just happens sometimes. Oh well! Better luck next time.
