Recently, I’ve been praying and thinking about bitterness. It’s not a pleasant topic, but it is one that I think we need to address within Christ’s Body.
Bitterness is especially poisonous because we cannot confine it to the one area in which we feel hurt. It is a stealthy, invasive root that creeps into every area of our lives. It doesn’t just affect the one relationship in which we have experienced pain; over time, it creeps into every relationship.
The writer of Hebrews issued a strong warning to the church about bitterness:
"Follow peace with all men… Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled." (Heb. 12:14-15)
This small portion of Scripture has loads of insight about the nature of bitterness, and I want to take a moment to unpack it.
Root of Bitterness
Bitterness is a root, not a fruit. In other words, we may not even realize that we are bitter because what we see can vary so widely. We may see anger outbursts, coldness toward others, harshness, emotional distance, and a wide range of other behaviors. Those actions are the result of something deeper in our lives.
"…lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you…"
If we trace those actions back to their cause, past the irritation of the moment to the deeper issue in our own hearts, we may be surprised to find a hidden root of bitterness.
It can happen easily. Life is unfair. People hurt us. We make foolish or selfish decisions that hurt ourselves. And when we become self-focused or hold grudges, we invite bitterness to settle into our lives.
The first step toward freedom is recognizing that we have a problem.
Outward Impact
Part of the great danger of bitterness is that it doesn’t just affect you.
"… and thereby many be defiled."
We know the saying: hurt people hurt people. If you struggle with bitterness, you likely allowed it to take root when someone hurt you. And with this poisonous root in your heart, you will keep hurting others and eventually plant bitterness in their hearts, too.
This is why we must be diligent to avoid bitterness. If we are Christians, we are to be known by our love (Jn. 13:35). Bitterness is the direct opposite of self-sacrificial, Calvary love.
The Key of Escape
I missed it at first. This verse doesn’t just tell us how horrible bitterness is; it tells us how to avoid bitterness in the first place (or how to escape if we’ve already fallen into bitterness).
"Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God…"
These words are packed with rich meaning.
First, we are to take diligent care to avoid this trap (that’s why the writer is warning us, after all!) Christianity isn’t passive. We don’t sit back and wish that we can somehow avoid bitterness; we vigilantly guard against it.
This is a time of war. We are soldiers who must guard against enemy attacks, not cozy down for a nap.
The word “fail” is especially interesting. It is the Greek word “hystereo,” which means, “to be behind, to come late or too tardily; to be left behind in the race and so fail to reach the goal, to fall short at the end; metaphorically fail to become a partaker: fall back or away from” (Strong’s Concordance).
In other words, run the race that is set before you (Heb. 12:1-2). This is once again a call to throw off passive living and sprint after our King. We are running for a heavenly prize; don’t give up!
And here’s the wonderful part: grace.
We have a low view of grace. We think it is the hug of God in our sin, some kind of divine acceptance of our pitiful state.
Hardly! Grace is the power of God working on our behalf to enable us to do what we cannot do in our own strength. Paul talks about how the grace of God enables him to build others up in God’s kingdom (1 Cor. 3:10), to labor alongside God’s grace in his personal walk with God (1 Cor. 15:10), and to encourage others that grace supplies all they need to abound as Christians (2 Cor. 9:8).
You see, we cannot prevent bitterness from lodging in our hearts or eradicate it once we find it there. But God can—through His grace. As we respond in faith and obedience, God pours His power upon us. That is the key to avoiding bitterness in the first place or finding freedom from it later.
Final Words
Bitterness has no place in the heart of a believer. Just as Christ laid down His life and loved fiercely unto the end, we are to lay down our lives for others and for our King.
