My home is such a beautiful and fun place to live. I live here with my mommy, daddy, sister and brother. I love being here with my family. I think my mommy and daddy call it Montreal, but I don’t know what that means. But that doesn’t matter. I am happy here. I love to run around in the backyard of our house with my brother and sister, nap inside on mommy and daddy’s lap, and go on long walks in the park. Everything we do is so much fun that I get so happy I just want to go up and greet everyone! But, a lot of the times, people run away from me or give me mean looks. I don’t know why though. They don’t act that way with my brother and sister. I don’t understand why they don’t want me to say hi to them. Maybe it’s because they like someone smaller, like my sister. She so small and shaky and she barks a lot. But then why do they still go to my brother? He is much larger than me. He big and bulky and his voice always makes me jump. Why do they go to them but not me? Is it the way I look? Do I smell? Maybe they don’t like my fur. I don’t know why…but everyone fears me and I never did anything. I smile at them to show them I want to be their friend, but they run away. Why do they run?
Brother says I’m not like the him or sister. He says that people fear me because of what I am. I don’t know what I am that makes everyone so scared. Brother says I’m too young to understand the reason, but I must stay away from people if I don’t want to get mommy and daddy in trouble. I try my best to follow what brother says, but I get so excited when I see everyone passing by. Sister is always yelling at me to be more careful and that if I keep being reckless then mommy and daddy must get rid of me, and if they get rid of me I won’t see anyone anymore. I don’t want to go away. I don’t want mommy and daddy to get rid of me. I’d miss them so much. I’d miss brother and sister. I’d miss my home. I want to be good. I will be good. For mommy and daddy.
Mommy is crying and daddy is trying to comfort her. I don’t know why mommy is so upset, and I can see the pain in daddy’s eyes. I don’t know why they are upset. I lay beside them with my head on mommy’s lap. I want to make her feel better but I don’t know what is wrong. I can hear through mommy’s tears saying “We can’t get rid of her,” and “It’s not fair. They shouldn’t make us get rid of her.” Are they talking about me? Did I do something wrong? I tried so hard to be good like brother and sister told me to be. I only got excited a few times on our walks. Did I still do bad? Was I still bad where mommy and daddy must get rid of me? I don’t understand. I’m so confused. What do I do? What do I do…
Mommy and daddy are refusing to send me away. They say this “ban” is unfair and that they shouldn’t have to get rid of me. I do not know what a “ban” is or what it means, so I asked brother and sister. They were cautious to tell me because I was so young, but because it was for mommy and daddy, they told me. They said a ban was a law created to outlaw something or to keep it out. I was still so confused. Why would there be a ban on me and no one else? I didn’t do anything wrong. That’s what mommy said. Brother said it isn’t just a ban on me. It’s a ban on my kind. My kind? I didn’t understand. I was more confused than ever. What was my kind?
I finally understand now. I understand why brother and sister were always telling me to be careful, and why mommy and daddy were so upset. My home, Montreal, put a ban on my kind. My kind being pitbulls. Brother and sister told me why they put a ban on my kind, and I wish it wasn’t true. They heard from stories passed down from generation to generation that pitbulls were used as fighting dogs. And because of the fights we inherited a bad name for ourselves even though it was our fault. Now our home put a ban on my kind. All pitbulls will be euthanized by October 3rd. I do not know what October 3rd is. I do not know what euthanize means. I don’t want to know. I’m scared to know. Why must this happen to us? What did we do to deserve this? Mommy and daddy say it is unfair that this is happening to us. Brother and sister fear for my safety. I fear for my safety. Mommy says we should leave Montreal. Move somewhere else. Daddy says there is no place that will accept me. I can see the pain in mommy and daddy’s faces. I can see how hurt they are. They don’t want to give me up, but they can’t leave home either. They are hurt. All because of me. Brother and sister cry with them every night. They fear October 3rd. They fear for my life.
October 3rd has passed. I am still here. Mommy and daddy are relieved. Brother and sister are happy. The ban on my kind had been “suspended” until something called Wednesday. Brother says that is only two days until the law is either passed or denied. I do not know what any of that means, but I do know that I get two more days with my family. And if what brother says denied means is true, and the law is denied, I won’t have to go. But if it is passed, then I only have a short time to spend with my family. If it is passed, I won’t see them ever again.I don’t know where I will be taken. I don’t know what will happen. I don’t know where euthanize is, but it scares me. I have bad dreams every night. Dreams of being taken away by big scary men. Dreams of others of my kind all around me. We are all trapped in small cold boxes. One by one the others are taken away by men in white clothes. They are taken, and never return. One by one the boxes are emptied. One by one they are taken, until it is my turn. The cold hands around my collar, the slippery floor below my claws. I want to go home but I can’t. dragged across the cold floor to a room illuminated with white. I’m scared! I’m scared. I’m scared…I’m scared…I don’t want to go. I want to be home. I want my mommy and daddy and brother and sister. I want to live. Why do I have to go? Why?
