Your Inner Monologue As A Person Who REALLY Doesn't Want To Go Out

Your Inner Monologue As A Person Who REALLY Doesn't Want To Go Out

We all have those thoughts at some point.

I wonder if people are going out tonight because honestly, I'd rather stay in and watch Iron Chef but if people go out then I prob-oh...okay I just got a message in the GroupMe and yes, everyone is going to Sigma Apple Pi tonight. OK. OK. I can do this. Everyone is excited... you should like the message in the GroupMe. Maybe comment? "Types out 'OMGGGGG let's make moves toniiiggghhhttt yaaaaaas."

Is that too much?

Yes. Yes, it is. *deletes message*

I'm going to absolutely hate myself tomorrow when I have to get up and do adult things and I'm a hungover mess. *Leaves out Pedialyte, Advil, water and the trash can for future me* I really should just stay in...nope there's another message from that diva Stepanie, "OMGGGGG let's make moves toniiiggghhttt yaaaaas" Wow what a lose — annnd everyone is liking that message. Just lovely. I should've sent it first.

Great now I need to pick out what to wear. This is always the worst part... I need to find something that I haven't worn before because my momma didn't raise no outfit repeater, something that flatters my figure (read: hot dog rolls) and something that isn't ~too~ revealing but doesn't scream future nun.

Ugh, I bet Stephanie is going to look great again as per usual. She always gets the guys anyways so why should I even care what I look like? I'll probably end up in the corner watching everyone having fun. No, no, no snap out of it. You're going to have a great time.

Shoot. I completely forgot about the pregame. Why do we have to pregame drinking BY drinking?? It doesn't even make sense. Why can't the pregame be the party and then I can go to bed earlier?

Ok, I'm here. I look pretty decent, Kanye's playing and people are already ripping shots. Do I join or do I go over and play pong? Oh wow, Derek is here. He's just so perfect... look at that smile. I think I'll just stand in the corner... no, no. Go talk to him! Make a move, girly! Breathe. Don't say anything stupid like the last time you saw him. He doesn't care about your cat's farts. Say something cute or funny.

"Are you a cowboy because you're the only ten I see."

Abort mission. Abort mission. That was neither cute nor funny. That was creepy. Oh look, Stephanie slid in next to him. You ruined your chances with him. Good job.

Let's just go to the actual party already. I need to twerk this entire night off. Man, why are the floors always so gosh darn sticky? And why is always so dark I can't see if this guy is cute or not.

Why are the lights on? Who turned off the music?? I was just beginning to have fun! *someone is yelling "shut up the cops are here!"* Welp. Looks like this party is busted. Time to go. I should probably get Stephanie's inebriated butt home — nope she's going home with Derek. Good.

Anyone want cookout?

Cover Image Credit: elisfanclub / Flickr

Popular Right Now

20 Fun Facts To Use When Introducing Yourself

As we embark on the semester, we are put on the spot in order to share interesting details about ourselves. This article discloses possible fun facts to tell others!

After experiencing my first week of classes, I have learned that every student needs a handy-dandy list of fun facts about themselves to tell other people. Many professors use the first couple of classes to learn about their students, so you may need to think about who you are and how you want to introduce yourself to your professor and classmates. We all have that one go-to interesting fact about ourselves, but sometimes you just have to mix it up!

1. My favorite hobby is...

What do you do in your free time? Personally, I love to stay active! I am a competitive Latin dancer and enjoy teaching and taking Zumba classes, going to the gym, and hiking.

2. I love...

Is there something, someone, or somewhere that you love? What makes your heart ache? What do you miss when it's gone? I can say that I love my friends because I feel my most confident when I'm surrounded by those who love and support me.

3. I look up to...

Is there someone you adore? Who mesmerizes you? Who do you wish to learn from? After watching "A Ballerina's Tale," I discovered Misty Copeland. In 2015 she became the first African American ballet dancer to become the Female Principal Dancer at American Ballet Theatre. Her passion, grace, and strength continuously motivate me to better myself as an athlete and an individual.

4. This art speaks to me because...

Coco Chanel said, "In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different." This encourages me to always follow my heart no matter what. I will never follow society's standards and norms because they do not define me. Chanel's saying definitely influences my character and lifestyle.

5. A funny and/or embarrassing memory of me is...

When you make others laugh they want to spend time and make memories with you! Don't be afraid to embarrass yourself. You will come off as down to earth, easy-going, and loyal.

6. My siblings or lack thereof influenced me by...

I can go on and on about my brother, who is 10 years older than I. We have opposite personalities and despite the age gap, we're quite close.

7. My pet(s) are my life because...

Only sad people don't like hearing about furry creatures, even if your pets are slimy and slithering creatures all human beings enjoy hearing pet tales!

8. I'm afraid of...

Your personality can be revealed by your likes and dislikes, including the things that you fear. I am terrified of change and the unknown, hence, the future is an anxiety-inducing topic to discuss for me.

9. I am the way I am because...

What have you gone through in life that has shaped you into who you are today? Remember to be open minded and allow yourself to open up to your peers. You may be surprised by how others respond and/or what others have endured as well.

10. The most unusual item that can be found in your dorm...

This is a fun fact about yourself that can easily liven up an awkward conversation. Think about your quirks and differences! One item I have in my dorm is my teddy bear, Peter, whom I like to joke is my boyfriend.

11. My dream job is...

In college, "What's your major?" is a widespread question. Nonetheless, skip the boring statement of "I'm majoring in..." and go in depth on what your dream job is (hopefully your major factors in to this dream of yours).

12. My hidden talents are...

Angelina Jolie is a knife thrower. Kendall Jenner can produce bird noises. Amanda Seyfried can crochet and knit. Is there anything special you can do? Some people have rare and unique talents, maybe you can think of some hidden talents of your own!

13. My guilty pleasure is...

I will say it a million times: don't be shy when introducing yourself to new people! I'll start by divulging my guilty pleasure: Youtube's family vlogging channel, "OKBaby"!

Check them out:

14. Some activities on my bucket list are...

This is an easy way to grab people's attention and find others with similar desires as you. Be an adventurer! Go out of your comfort zone!

15. Talk about your best friend...

How would your best friend describe you? What do you love to do with your best friend?

16. Talk about an accomplishment of yours...

You are incredible and have achieved so much! Reveal something that you are proud of — show off a little!

17. This one time at my job...

Bosses breathing down your neck. Curious coworkers asking personal questions. Cursing customers who never leave you alone. Your job can be filled with tons of hilarious situations that can easily entertain a crowd.

18. During the summer...

Any scars with stories? Any summer flings? Any lessons learned from the tanning too long? Now that summer is over, disclose memories that can leave positive impressions on others.

19. I volunteer at...

Do you do any community service? Share a funny moment while you were volunteering. What did you learn while there? Would you continue?

20. [blank] is meaningful to me because...

What do you appreciate in life? What brightens your day? What makes you fall in love? What does someone have to do to make you smile?

Finally, remember to be outgoing! Reveal that three-mile smile and open your arms to learning about others. Spread smiles, love, and happiness.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

8 Things To Do With Your Girl Friends When You DON'T Want To Drink On A Friday Night

Friday nights don't have to be all about drinking or just staying in your room.


While college may seem like the wildest time of everyone's life, not everyone drinks and not everyone wants to go out every weekend. With this in mind, there are so many other things to do with friends, even by yourself, that doesn't involve you sitting in your room at night.

1. Have a sleepover

Text your best friends, get plenty of snacks, and don't forget your robe or fuzzy socks! Order pizza and binge-watch your favorite TV show. Who doesn't love a good girl's night in?

2. Go to the movies

TBH, I'm the one percent of the population who still hasn't seen Endgame.

3. Go bowling/ice skating/escape room/something kinda active

With a group of friends, it can be a pretty cheap and fun Friday night.

4. Board game night

Board game marathons are the best. I'm pretty sure my friends only have Cards Against Humanity, but board games are definitely worth the investment.

5. Try that one place you've always wanted to go!

I cannot tell you the number of times I've said 'I want to go there' and still haven't been to said place. When you don't want to go out on a Friday night, hit up that one spot you've been DYING to go.

6. Have a dessert party with friends

Have your friends bring a dessert, or go out to a restaurant and split them! It's a great way to chat, catch up, and enjoy some sugar!

7. Make a fort

I haven't made a fort as a kid, but you can bet I'm gonna drag my roommates out of their rooms and do this next time I'm bored.

8. Cook or bake something new

Try out that new recipe (or a few) that you've just pinned on Pinterest.

Related Content

Facebook Comments