Dear Past Self,

Everything sucks right now, doesn’t it? Everything seems super dark and it looks like nothing is ever going to get better, right?

I know.

I remember.

I remember the tears. I remember the endless thoughts racing through your head. I remember those nights of debating whether it was even worth it to wake up in the morning.

But hey, tomorrow you are going to wake up and it’s still going to be hard, but you’re going to get through it. How do I know? I know because I am living proof of it.

You’re going to wake up one day and tell yourself “why am I allowing myself to live through my own personal hell” and you’re going to get help. You’re going to sing a song that reminds you why life is so beautiful and why it’s so worth living. You’ll start taking care of yourself by not only eating healthy meals and stopping the endless counting of calories, but by knowing what you need to do to avoid falling into the pit of hopelessness and despair. You’re not going to fail the classes you missed because you were too afraid to go to school because of what people might be saying about you or what your brain would make you think they were saying.

I am here to tell you that your future is bright and that there really is a light at the end of this tunnel. As I’m writing this, I’m three weeks away from finishing my first year of my dream college in the best city in world, and life couldn’t be better. In less than a year, I’m going to start auditioning for shows around New York City, and it’s going to be really hard and it’s going to take a toll but I am ready for the challenge and it’s going to be worth it.

Past self, it was hard. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever been through or ever will have to go through, but thank you. Without you, I wouldn’t be the strong woman I’ve become and am continuing to become. Keep pushing through because I promise it gets better.