Three weeks ago, my fiancé and I enrolled in a free marriage course through our local church. The course was recommended to us by our officiant. In his words, “if you’re going to commit to somebody forever, it’s probably important that you invest in them.”

While our officiant is a smart guy, my partner and I weren’t convinced. We have been together for over four years, supported each other through extreme highs and lows, and rarely disagree (let alone fight). We thought that we knew everything the other needed and had built up a rock-solid foundation for our future.

Boy, were we wrong.

Today over lunch, my beloved clasped my hand, looked into my eyes and said, “I am so glad we chose to do this course. I already feel more balanced in our relationship.” WOW. Mind you, this guy is not quick to draw conclusions, and we are only a quarter of the way through the course. This was HUGE!

In “The Marriage Course” curriculum by Nicky and Sila Lee, couples in long-term relationships attend multiple sessions that cover communication, resolving conflict, good sex, coping with separation (specifically for military families), forgiveness, and more.

With school, finances, work, and other responsibilities that come with adult life, it can be easy to not value the time one has with their partner, and this course draws out what goes unsaid to make your relationship stronger. Both my fiancé and I realized that we were not making time for dates during the week.

Between texting and FaceTime, we didn't even notice our lack of one-on-one time! We also realized that we had developed some bad listening habits (like going off on tangents and interrupting) that were creating distance between us.

These aren’t signs that we are destined to fail, but merely that we are human and have the opportunity to learn from our mistakes. Since the course, our relationship has changed for the better.

We have found a consistent day for us to spend quality time together and we have become more conscious of our responses to each other in conversation. These small efforts have led to a deeper connection that will last a lifetime.

If you’re interested in attending the same marriage course that I attended with my partner, you can find a course near you here. I can't recommend it enough!