My father is a physician so day in and day out, his job is to provide his patients with the medical advice and care that they need. Although it is a job, oftentimes those who work in the medical field can't help but take it home. Whether or not your parent is a physician, nurse, physician assistant or nurse practitioner, you later realized that there are some interesting quirks associated with a provider's home life...
1. Your medicine cabinet looked like the inside of a pharmacy.
Even though there was medicine in every spare cabinet and in the fridge, it was often expired or not what you needed.
2. Not to mention that your cabinets were always stocked with saltines and cough drops.
I thought Halls was a candy for the longest time.
3. You rarely went to another provider for sports physicals.
Sports physicals also served as a test of whether or not my dad remembered the little things, like my past medical history and birthdate.
4. Parent career day was always a blast because you spent the day exploring the hospital.
My brother and I utilizing the P.T. room, circa 2001.
5. Everyone assumed that you were also going to become a provider.
“Are you going to be a doctor just like dad?” It's not quite a family business, but thanks for inquiring.
6. Or worse, when people assumed that your parent could magically grant you admission to professional school.
Sadly there's no Qadri School of Medicine, so I guess I'm taking the MCAT.
7. But you did have access to some great connections.
...After you swore on your life to behave while shadowing their coworkers.
8. Your community service was usually at a hospital.
I have some awesome memories of gossiping with patients at the Veteran's Affairs Hospital for my service.
9. They scrutinized each scene in any medical drama you tried to watch together.
Thank you for ruining "Grey’s Anatomy," "Scrubs," "ER," "Children’s Hospital," etc...
10. You borrowed your parent’s uniform for a Halloween costume.
I was a doctor for Halloween for 15 years straight.
11. You recognize this brand.
And you probably used this stethoscope for aforementioned costume.
12. Other kids assumed you were loaded.
FAFSA also showed you no mercy, no matter how many times you reminded them about professional school loans.
13. You had to be bleeding out or missing an appendage for your parents to take your illness seriously.
OK, maybe it doesn't help that WedMD is my homepage.
14. Sometimes, even without a diagnosis or any real reason, you arbitrarily got antibiotics for any sign of infection.
Our parents are personally responsible for MRSA.
15. If you complained of anything, you automatically received a bottle of pain relievers.
I now have another reason to worry about my liver.
16. When you did get checked out, your parent gave unnecessarily detailed histories to the other provider.
Dad, the dentist doesn’t need to know about my thyroid condition.
17. And if it was the ER, you got a play by play of the results on the monitor.
It’s better than ESPN, honestly.
18. Your parents had very strong opinions of your interests in the medical field.
You either were encouraged strongly or warned to save yourself.
19. When you were sick, your phone call consisted of a patient interview, diagnosis and treatment plan.
I could make a SOAP note out of most of our calls.
20. Obamacare, whether they supported it or not, was a hot topic in your house.
21. All of your pens, clipboards and random flashlight keychains had names of drugs on them.
I just want to know where my Viagra pen is.
22. You were reminded that genetics was on your side if you did poorly in a science class.
“You didn’t even take Ecology, Dad.”
23. Family members are forever asking your parents to check them out.
"Should I forward aunty to your office phone for billing?"
24. You’ve heard so many stories about (unnamed) patients that you could author a case study book.
HIPPA is the only thing that stands between me and my book deal.
25. You got a lecture for using a misnomer.
“You do not have a migraine; it’s a tension headache.”
26. They tried their best to help you out in your science courses…
27. But if it was organic or physics, they assured you that you would never use either in the field.
“I haven’t thought about benzene in 20 years.”
28. Everything depends upon their call schedule.
Hopefully your parent had a flexible job, otherwise there were lots of trips to the office during what was supposed to be “off duty” time.
29. Their vacation time was usually only for a short window of time.
So the days when they are off are especially cherished.
30. A continuing education conference meant a family vacation.
Or you fantasized about the faraway places you could when the magazines came in the mail.
31. Board exams equaled one month of your parent trying to quiet the house down to study.
My dad taking a moment to Snapchat his new study spot.
32. Your friends were slightly mortified that you had books with nude anatomy drawings in them at your house.
I don’t know why the diagram of the muscles also required a detailed depiction of male genitalia.
