You may think it’s all over. You may think you have nothing left. Trust me, it’s not.
Breakups are rough. I’ll admit it, I’ve gone through a few in my time that have left me wondering if I’ll ever be the same person I was once was. You find yourself in the other person, among interests, values, and commonalities. You believe that you’ve become invincible because the other person has built you into a strong person. Every day is a good day because you’re always having fun. You knew who you were in the relationship, and now it’s just…over.
It just happened so quickly: the crying, the fighting, the “I hate you, I love you, I want you”, the instant drive-offs, the 3 A.M. phone calls, the silence at the other end of the line. Then there was the lull, the agonizing pain that dragged on for weeks, and the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally, acceptance.
You’re incredulous about what just occurred, it can’t be. Your one true love just walked out. How could this happen? It makes you angry, at the other person, at yourself, at the relationship as a whole. You begin to wonder what you could have done to avoid all of this. If only I hadn’t lied...if only he had listened…if only we had talked about it more. Your thoughts lead to negative outlooks on the future. It was definitely something I did, what if I do it again to the next person? They’ll leave just like the others. I can’t go out anymore, even if my friends want me to. I just can’t. Then finally, you understand. But, I guess it was for the better, right? It wasn’t meant to be, which means I’m supposed to with someone else. If I were happy then, I’m bound to find someone who I am ecstatic to be with.
You begin to realize what you’ve had in the past, and you think you don’t have it anymore, but that’s not true. You will be able to listen to that song again, the one you blasted on those summer drives. You will laugh again, so hard that your abs will ache. You will be able to watch those shows that you once stayed up till 2 A.M. during Netflix binges. You will get your flirt game on back at the bar. You will return to the places that left you speechless with its views. You will feel again. You will fall in love again. They hurt you, but didn’t permanently damage you.
Keep pushing forward and leave the past in the dust. Look at what you do have as opposed to what you don’t, because ultimately you’ll realize the only thing you don’t have anymore is someone you once loved who is now just a face in a crowd.
