There have been times in my life that I've thought to myself "But I've put so much into this, I can't walk away..." and it's on so many different levels - friendships, relationships, jobs, hobbies, you name it. I understand that there are things that you feel the need to stick with and trust me, that's okay. There have been times that I've thought, "I just feel like I need to prove I'm strong enough to see it to the end..." but when that thing is consuming your life and only causing you stress and you're sacrificing your happiness and wellbeing, why are you still doing it? You can put your whole life into something and not ever feel fulfilled, so why do you owe your time, energy and commitment to something that isn't fulfilling?
Newsflash: you don't. You don't owe yourself to anything or anyone.
This is something that I know I struggle with, so I'm sure so many others out there do, too. You feel like you owe it to your job to check your email constantly, even when you're on vacation, trying to get away. You feel like you owe it to your friends to always go out because you don't have a real excuse to miss out, even if sometimes you're just not feeling up to it. You feel like you owe it to people to attend events or you owe it to a relationship to stick it out, regardless of if you've been happy in years. I get it, trust me, but you really don't have to.
Yes, there are certain obligations you do have to attend and you do want to be a good friend, good girlfriend, good employee, blah blah blah. I'm not saying ditch everything, blow all of your money, and be reckless, but you don't owe it to anyone to always say "yes" when you don't have a legitimate excuse. If you don't want to go out for drinks with friends or coworkers or whoever, just say, "No, but thanks for the invite." You don't HAVE to always have something better to do. It's okay to just not be up for it.
While it's great to feel the need to put your everything into something, you don't always have to pour every ounce of your happiness into it. If you're so stressed over your job day in and day out, why are you still there? It's really okay to look elsewhere or talk to your manager about switching things up. If they react in a way that they're willing to help you, then try hanging around. If they aren't willing to help, here it is again: you don't owe it to them to stay. Find a different job and even if that job doesn't work out, that's okay! Just don't pour your energy into something that isn't worth it to you.
In a relationship, so many people feel like they owe it to their significant other to stay because of a million different reasons. Trust me when I tell you, if you stay because you feel you have to, and not because you want to, it won't end well for anybody. Yes, ending a relationship is hard, but if you're only in it because you feel obligated and not because you love being in it (aside from loving the person in general - because there is a difference between loving someone and loving being with them), then you're not doing yourself or them any favors. Find a way to change things around or to walk away, because both you and the other person deserves this.
You don't owe yourself to anyone or anything. There's always a way to make things work out so that you're doing what you have to do, but also finding happiness in it. Next time you're thinking, "Why am I doing this?" make sure the answer is because you're happy and it brings you joy. If it does, great and if it doesn't, it's okay to move on.
