Parents' Weekend in Athens just came to its conclusion. Many times, though, Parents' Weekend consists of the same bars, restaurants, and activities all four years of college. Here are some ways to spice things up with Mom and Dad next year.
1. Visit your least favorite professor's office hours!
Mom will GO OFF on them asking why you have such a low grade. If she complains enough, maybe she can save you a semester of repeating the class! It worked in grade school, so it should absolutely still work now!
2. Climb Bong Hill
GiphyGrab your contraband and scale the side of this classic Athens destination for the best (and highest, figuratively and literally) sunset of your life. Perfect for if your parents are older and aren't chill at all.
3. Pay a visit to Mike at The Shack
Another perfect option for you if your parents aren't the slightest bit chill, especially with the underage purchase and consumption of alcohol. The low prices and excellent customer service will make a lasting impression on your weekend and your memory. Your parents will remind you of your heartfelt visit with Mike the following day.
4. Spend the late evening at The Crystal
By far the classiest and most parent-friendly bar in all of southeast Ohio, Crystal's charm and atmosphere is the perfect destination for deep talks and warm, fond memories. If Crystal somehow becomes stale and you'd like to change locations, Pyramids is a close second, perfect for when you're a couple drinks in and in the mood for some good old-fashioned dancing with the folks.
5. Under absolutely NO circumstances should you visit Pumpkin the Cat
https://www.instagram.com/p/B06gBJUl1Zx/
Pumpkin embodies everything that is impure and wrong with Athens and Ohio University, perhaps the sole origin of our "party school" reputation. He is the scum of Court Street, the only ugly, unlovable thing in all of Athens county okay I can't do this anymore I love you Pumpkin you are everything that is right in this world.
6. Race up Jeff Hill, Bryan Stairs, and Morton Hill
Kaylee Smith
Honestly, our parents are in better shape than us,
7. Go in the CI bathroom
The cleanest and less crowded bathroom on all of campus!
8. Eat at Shively
The best way to thank your mom for all her years of cooking for you.
9. Get family photos taken on Dirty South
The catwalks can basically count as ancient architecture.
10. Look at Blackboard
Blackboard is literally the new Candy Crush, so your parents are bond to eat that shit up.
If you follow this list, I can guarantee you a weekend for the books. Your folks will want to come down and spend time with you every weekend! On second thought, if you don't want them there all the time, don't follow my advice, and keep the secrets of OU all to yourself. Take them to the nicer bars and do the normal tourist things if you hate them, I guess.
Jokes aside have a wonderful, safe weekend!
