To anyone who has seen their sibling with an IV,
You want to seem fine because you want everyone's attention to be on your sibling because it needs to be about making them feel better. It's difficult because you really aren't OK, but you need to be strong for your sibling and for your parents because there's nothing harder than having a child in the hospital. Having someone in the hospital that is as close to you as a sibling is so hard because you want them to be OK so they can hang out with you, and so you can have fun together. You can't focus on school and on your own issues, but it's so hard because you are so worried about your buddy. No one really understands how difficult it is because it's an unusual thing to them, but to you it's as normal as getting Christmas presents.
It's sad, but true. You know in your heart that everything will be OK, but it's just the waiting that is the scariest part. Sitting at school just waiting for someone in your family to tell you that their surgery went great and you will be able to see them soon. Or worse, waiting in the waiting room of the hospital. It's funny because the name of the room is the "waiting room," but it's the single most awful place to wait for anything. You hate waiting there, because you don't even want to be there to begin with.
It's so hard to be anywhere but right next to your sibling's side the entire time through everything. You've become almost perfect at calming them down and reminding them that you love them and can't wait to spend every second with them after they come home. Even if they can't hear you or can't answer, you know they are saying the same to you. You need someone to tell you it will be OK as much as they tell your sibling that it will be OK, because it's a really hard thing to see your best friend like that.
If you're in there for a long amount of time, then hospital food starts to taste good, and the hospital "bed" A.K.A. the pull-out twin sized bed doesn't seem so bad. Everyone wants to be there for you and wants to help in any way that they know how, but there comes a point where you don't want anything else but to go home, sleep in your own bed and eat all the casseroles that everyone you've ever met has made you.
You wouldn't change anything about your sibling for one minute, but being in the hospital for so long is such a draining thing to have to go through. You see this stuff on movies when you're little and you never think it will be you, but when it is, you don't really know any better. You just make the best of your situation.
Sincerely,
I've been there
[Praying for you, Ry and Morgan.]
