A Senior's Letter To Her Sorority Sisters, Two Years Later

A Senior's Letter To Her Sorority Sisters, Two Years Later

As I enter into my final year at Arizona State, I wanted to write this open letter to my Delta Gamma sisters that helped me get to where I am today.

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To my Sisters,

When I first came to campus, I felt so lost with who I was and what I wanted to gain from going Greek or even in my life, but then I met you all. It was like looking into the future of everything I wanted to be and more, to be a woman who is confident, kind and real.

For these reasons, I joined. Though I may not have known this then, this decision would be the best thing that could have ever happened to me.

Freshman year, I was lost.

I felt so alone and as if the world was coming down around me. I pulled farther and farther away from my sisters who I had just met, and never even told them how I was feeling or that I was getting ready to transfer. When my decision was almost final, something told me to reach out, and I did.

The overwhelming amounts of love and support brought this little voice to the back of my mind telling me "stay."

Though these feelings of loss and sadness did not leave, I followed my heart and decided to stay for my sisters.

Once I returned for my second year at ASU and with Delta Gamma, I got into an accident. I was driving on the I-10 to Tempe when two cars came to a dead stop in the middle of the highway and I did not stop in time. I rear-ended one car and the other took off. I totaled both my car and the one I hit, was left with cuts, burns, and bruises all over my body, and a concussion.

I chose not to tell too many people about it because I thought no one would care. But my sorority sisters did. They reached out to me and made sure I was OK and checked in on me if I needed anything. They saved me from falling deeper into the hole that I was already in, and for that I am thankful.

Though I healed from this, I still felt myself distancing from my sisters.

Even with me pushing myself away, they still stayed by my side and motivated me to seek help for what was wrong. Little did I know then that seeking help would bring me to the discovery of a failed knee surgery from high school.

I had two ACL reconstruction surgeries in high school and discovered that I suffer from depression systems when going through stress caused by knee pain, which explained the helplessness I had been feeling for two years. The next step was to have two surgeries within the year to fix my knee.

I got my third knee surgery about a month before classes started for my third year and was unable to walk for weeks. I was already feeling better and becoming more open to the support from my sisters. Shortly after returning to school, I got into another accident. I had been practicing riding my bike to see how my knee felt after weeks of recovery when a car didn't look before turning and struck me.

Fortunately, I walked away with minor injuries, and yet another painful thing I tried to hide from my sisters.

All of these physical burdens continued to pile on to my mental health, and the gloomy reminder I would be getting another knee surgery in the winter. I felt the lost feeling from freshman year begin to return — until some of you that I hadn't really been close to stepped into my life and helped me through the pain.

Once I finally allowed myself to open up and let my sisters into my life, nothing else mattered.

All of these physical ailments and accidents that riddled my body with pain felt like just minor things whenever I am with you. You all may not have realized this, but I probably wouldn't be alive today without you.

Some people outside of Greek life may think this all sounds ridiculous, because how could I possibly be close to around 200 of you realistically and how could you all have possibly helped the way you did, and I will admit that I am not close with all of you.

Despite this, I know who you all are because you are in this chapter and Delta Gamma family for a reason, and by knowing that I know I have you love and support whenever I need it.

Though I thank all of you sisters, there are you few who I hold very dearly and to whom this letter is truly for.

The ones that have stuck by me since freshman year when I hated myself and never wanted to leave my room.

The ones that entered my life in a difficult time and never left. The ones that always made me feel welcomed and loved even when I felt like I had no one.

The ones that brought me into the most wonderful family, and the ones that allowed me to bring them into that same home.

The ones that don't even know my name but still smile and say hello in passing.

The ones who were there for me and didn't know why.

You never ask questions or push me to talk about the things that were hurting me, but still, you were there.

To my sisters in my "crew," thank you for the love and laughter you bring me every day.

To my sister that drove me to class without hesitation and I could talk about literally anything with, thank you for letting me open up to you with no judgment.

To my sister that I work with, thank you for all the love and memories we've made together over the years.

To my big, thank you for being the woman in this world that I look up to.

To my first little, thank you for bringing out the fun in me even when all I want to do is sleep all day.

To my second little, thank you for coming into my life when you did because I don't know where I'd be without you.

To my family, thank you for welcoming me in and being my home away from home.

To the rest of my sisters, thank you for being a part of this big and wonderful family.

I wanted to thank you all for being in my life during these times of difficulty. Whether you were aware of it or not, I really wanted to reflect on everything I've gone through with you all to get me to my senior year and through my (hopefully) last surgery that I just had done in December.

Two years ago, I never thought I'd be here. I thought I was transferring to graduate at a different university, and for a little bit even though I would not return to school at all. I thought I would leave this chapter and never look back, but you are the reason I stayed.

This chapter really did save me from myself and pushed me to keep moving forward even when all I wanted to do was stop. Thank you all for being a part of my life, and I can't wait to finish my last year of college with you by my side.

Sincerely,

Your Delta Gamma Sister

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A Real AF Guide To Rush

Here's to finding the perfect home away from home.
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Before going through rush, I heard the most outrageous rumors from "they only give you a bid if you're a double legacy" to "some sororities ask you if you were a slut in high school." Looking back, hearing all of these rumors made me way more nervous than I was before. So if your planning on rushing this fall, I'm sure you're feeling just as overwhelmed as I was. So here's a guide to making sure you have the best rush experience possible.

Pre-Rush

-Letters of Recommendation: They're not necessarily mandatory, but recs do matter. People may tell you not to worry about it or that sororities don't even look at them, but recs let the sororities get to know you and what you bring to the table before they even meet you.

-Check Your Social Media: If your Instagram or Facebook feature pictures that your grandmother or boss wouldn't approve of (Ex. you doing a keg stand), then chances are that sororities won't approve of it either. Active members look at your social media prior to rush, so go through your social media accounts and make sure everything is appropriate.

-Plan Outfits Ahead of Time: If you're rushing at a big university like I did, then you may be having to endure nine tretouse days of rush, and, trust me, you're not going to want to be choosing your outfit when you wake up the first day of rush at 5am. Also, wear clothes that fit your style: if you don't like Lilly Pulitzer and pearls than don't wear Lilly Pulitzer and pearls.

-Pack Your Purse With Essentials: Always carry a handheld fan, chapstick, makeup, oil blotting sheets, hairbrush, mints, hair ties and bobby pins, Advil, flip-flops, umbrella/rain jacket, water bottle, and snack. You never know what you're going to need.

-Familiarize Yourself With Sorority Vocab and Greek Letters: Hint, the "Phi" in Alpha Phi isn't pronounced the same way as it is in Phi Mu. For a complete list of recruitment vocabulary click here.

During Rush

-Be Yourself and Smile: After being greeted by a doorway full of screaming sorority girls, you'll most likely be paired with a girl who has your same major or has something else in common with you. Just be yourself and talk about what you enjoy. Remember to be engaged in the conversation (or at least act like it) and smile. These girls have worked so hard to make sure you have a good experience, and your resting bitch face and negative attitude isn't going to make them want to invite you back.

-The "Three Bs": Boys, Booze, and Bible: the three topics to stay away from. Steer clear of any controversial topic that may make you look bad and make others feel uncomfortable. The girls talking to you want to have conversations with the real you but keep it appropriate.

-Take Notes: After leaving each house be sure to write down your impressions, who you talked to, what you talked about, and a ranking out of ten. With so many sororities and the fast moving pace, without keeping notes you may forget which house you loved verses the one that was sub par.

-Have an Open Mind: If you go into rush determined to end up in one specific house then chances are you are not going to enjoy rush. Go in with an open mind. Meet all the houses and girls until you make your final decisions. Don't be too upset if one of your favorite houses drops you. If they drop you it's because they think you would thrive more in another sorority.

-Get To Know Others: Girls in your Rho Chi group are going to be your best friends this week because you're all going through the same new and exciting experience. Also, talk to the girls in line with you while you're waiting to go into houses. It'll not only relieve the stress, but it'll allow you to see what other girls the sorority is interested in. Look around, meet people, and see if you could see yourself being in their pledge class.

-Don't Listen To Stereotypes: Every university going to a have certain stereotypes of each. Whether its the goody goodies, partiers, druggies, or the girls who sleep around, if you go in with an open mind and actually connect with a sorority, then go for it despite what their stereotype is. You aren't going to want to be in a sorority just because they're known as being the "good girls" if you don't connect with them.

-Don't Be Pressured: It doesn't matter if your mom, sister, or friends are trying to get you to pledge a certain sorority. Take a step back and think about if you actually like the sorority itself apart from those pressuring you. You're not going to be happy in a sorority that you chose just because someone else wants you to be in it.

To Bid Day and Beyond

Whatever house you end up running to on bid day, I'm sure it's the right one for you. Rush is one of the situations where you have to "trust the system", so rely on your notes to choose your rankings during voting and just let it happen. Even if you open your bid and see the one sorority you didn't want, still have a positive attitude and an open mind. You don't want to be that one girl crying because she didn't get the sorority she wanted. Those girls chose you for reason, so give it a chance before you drop out.

I would never have met the amazing friends I have today without my sorority and it's the best decision I could've made for myself. Have fun with it and get ready to meet the friends you'll have for a lifetime. So here's to finding the perfect home away from home.

XOXO

Cover Image Credit: Instagram

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I Didn't Join A Panhellenic Sorority

It's okay if you don't join a panhellenic sorority. Sometimes a different organization can turn out to be the best thing.

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Before going to college I was faced with a dilemma, should I rush? I wanted to rush just for the social aspect, I thought it would be my best shot at making a bunch of friends. However, deep down I knew that greek life really wasn't me. I didn't want to do something if I wasn't one hundred percent behind it. There was a part of me that did want to be in a sorority but the other part of me really didn't want to rush. Let me be clear, I don't think Greek life is bad, I just think it wasn't for me. I talked to my brother and sister-in-law about this because they both were in Greek life at the college I attend now; they told me that they didn't think I would like it either.

What my brother and sister-in-law told me that I might like was, a Christian sorority called Sigma Phi Lambda. When they described it to me it seemed like exactly what I was wanting. As soon as I got to college I sought them out; and I went to their recruitment nights. I loved it! It was exactly what I was looking for. I ended up joining. This sorority brought me an amazing group of friends! Most importantly, I have joined the perfect sorority for me! A few things I liked most about Sigma Phi Lambda was the people were so welcoming, it was more low key and laid back, I was still able to have a big and a "Pham", we still did lots of sorority things whilst also having activities that strengthened us on our walks with the Lord, and I gained so many sisters that I now have strong relationships with. Sigma Phi Lambda gave me so many friends and something to be involved in on campus. They gave me somewhere to belong and I am so glad I chose to join them.

Rushing may be exactly what you need when you go to college, but if it's not that is okay. Just join something that makes you happy. Join an organization that helps you grow and surrounds you with people that you want to be around. I promise when you get to college that there is an organization for just about everything, find the one that fits you. No matter what you choose I promise it's good. Just make sure you choose what is right for you.

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