Dear little sister,

I know we aren't technically blood-related, but in this family, a step-sibling is just as much family as if we came out of the same person, so let's not put labels on things.

First of all, when did you get old enough to be in high school anyway? When I think of you I still think of the little hellion running through the sprinkler with soaked white-blonde hair and jumping on the trampoline, laughing through a partially toothless mouth. Now you're almost unfamiliar to me physically. The white-blonde hair has darkened a bit to a more ashy blonde and straightened to perfection, and you're teeth are strapped with braces. There's a hint of eyeliner and gloss along with a spritz of perfume. This is a different girl.

And sometimes, I'm sad to say, you're unfamiliar to me emotionally, too. You have your group of friends and boys that consume your free time now, instead of tie dying t-shirts or letting me test out nail designs on you. Sometimes I feel bad because I have no clue what you're hobbies are anymore or where you see yourself in the future. Sure, Mom fills me in every once in a while over the phone, but what kind of sister am I for not learning first hand? Especially in such a critical time in your life: on your way to high school. This is the time when I'm supposed to give you the low-down on the teachers to kiss up to and how to get Mom and Dad to let you go to a friends house on the weekend. So, as a placeholder, I'm going to give you a little breakdown on what you're life is going to be like for the next four years, even if I'm miles away:

Every cliche in the book says that high school is the best time of your life. I'm sorry, but it's really not. There's nothing about eight hour days sitting in uncomfortable chairs waiting for a crappy lunch with bitchy girls and emotionally underdeveloped guys that makes it the best. However, disdain from my unsatisfying high school days aside, you will have fun. You will meet people who will, hopefully, be life-long friends, have teachers who will see unending potential in you, and experience too many firsts to even count. You will have your first time driving, your first party possibly unless you're a square like your big sis, and maybe your first sexual interaction. This will be the first time in your life that you will have joint freedom over your decisions and your body, with the guidance of Mom and Dad, of course. It's a lot of pressure, and you will feel it every damn day, even more so as the years progress. By the time you're a senior, you will have gone from picking which club to join to picking where you're going to spend the next four years, living off coffee and Netflix and trying to figure out this thing called life. My advice here would be to always, ALWAYS ALEXIS ANN, go with your gut. If something doesn't feel right in your bones do not rush into it. Despite what guidance counselors and professors will tell you, you will have time to figure things out. There is no deadline for living your life the way you see fit.

The next bit of advice is a bit of a touchy subject for reasons I'm sure you already know. In high school you will fall for a boy, maybe a few if you're lucky. It's really easy and it happens incredibly fast. You're going to meet this boy who seems like the moon and the stars. His love is going to be brutally painful, but all too satisfying. This isn't necessarily his fault either; you're going to be his test run for loving a woman properly. But, listen here, he is not the guy for you. There's this idea out there that love is supposed to hurt; this is not true. Loving the right person should not be a mania of jealousy and emotional degradation mixed in with days of euphoria. Love is steady and forgiving. Love lifts you up and teaches you to love yourself in return. So, when that boy you love in high school makes you feel small or causes you to second guess a kiss, remember these words: he is not everything to me, I'm everything to me. Love yourself first, my dear.

The last part of my advice is probably the hardest to talk about. Now, I've already seen this side in your life which hurts me, but I'm here to show you that it's going to work out. Do not let anyone make you believe you are not the beautiful soul that you are. People are mean. They will do anything to make it hard for you to feel good and hold yourself up because, well, they can't do it for themselves. The gossip will happen. You'll hear things about yourself that are almost ridiculously far from the truth. My advice? Kill them with kindness. People with still spread lies and try to pull you down, but in the end they can never say that you were unkind in return. You have to meet them with kindness and remind yourself that everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.

Now, I know it's still going to hurt, but Alexis, never hurt yourself in return. Whether that's emotionally or physically, just don't do it. I've done both in my time and I can honestly tell you it's not cute and not once did it make me better as a person. Encourage yourself, enrich yourself, advocate for yourself. Do yoga, read a book that you love, dress nice for no reason at all, and smile at strangers. Be the best possible version of yourself by being happy, healthy, and beautifully real.

At the end of the day, Lex, you're going to do this your own way, maybe quite differently than I did (one can only hope), but when you need me I will always be here. There are so many things that I have experienced that Mom and Dad haven't and know nothing about that you will most likely experience in today's world. So, pretty girl, I'm only a call, text, letter, video chat, or messenger pigeon away. And you know how lame I am, I always have free time.

I love you, little sister.