To the Men Who Will Someday Marry My Sister:
There are some things I think you should know before spending the rest of your life by her side and some things I need you to promise me.
She is absolutely insane. It runs in the family. Sorry.
She will question you on everything you do and will definitely fight with you for no reason. She may not always show it, but she loves hard. Deep down. This is why she questions you: She needs to know that you care just as much. The fighting? Well, that's just something our family does. We’re loud and we argue. Give her about 10 minutes to cool down and she will be giving you a hug acting like nothing ever happened.
She may be one of the funniest people you will ever meet. Whether she actually makes a joke or makes a fool of herself, you will never be bored with her. She will definitely make your lives together very interesting.
At this point, you may have realized she doesn't always have it all together. She’s all over the place. If you haven't realized this, you will soon. She tends to do a million things at once and then gives up all at once too. She gets what she needs done, it just takes a little time. I guess the best word to describe her in any situation would be a “spaz.”
You should also know, to my family, you may never be good enough. Joining our family is a huge commitment and everyone is involved in our relationships. So although some may like you, some may not, and you just need to be okay with that. If my sister loves you, she will love you unconditionally. Just know that the two people that absolutely have to approve are our parents. We don’t have it all together, we're a mess, but together we have it all. (Super cheesy, kinda judging myself.) They are the two most important people to any of us besides each other.
That’s another thing. Get my approval.
You may be asking, “but isn't it traditional to get the father's approval?” Yes, you need that, but you also need mine. There is nothing in this world I wouldn't do for my sisters, including beating up a grown man. If I don’t like you, she will have to reevaluate. Count your blessings, sir, and play your cards right.
Here are the promises I need you to make me:
Promise you’ll stick by her side, no matter how many times she fights with you or how annoying she gets. She is worth every headache she may cause, believe it or not.
Promise you'll laugh at her jokes even if they're not funny. She is funny, so I don't think you'll have a problem doing this.
Promise me you'll help her get herself together, I need some help here. She can’t always do it on her own.
Promise you won’t let our intimidating family affect how you feel. We may be big and scary but I assure you, you'll grow to love us.
Promise you'll get mine, and more importantly my parents approval. We mean everything to her and I know she would want you to ask.
Make me these promises and I promise to support your relationship through every hardship and love you like my own brother. Love my sister and never let her go. She will be the best thing that ever happened to you because she is definitely one of the best things that has ever happened to me.
With love,
Your Future In-Law
