To the girl who wants to please everyone,

I know how you feel.

Whenever you're asked to do something, whether it's something big or rather minuscule, you always make the decision only after evaluating the way it would affect everyone around you. This isn't even a solely conscious thing. You just do it. You do it because you want to please everyone. You just do it because that's all you've ever done.

You're asked to go out with one of your friends but you realize the rest of your friend group isn't invited and they'll just be staying in, so you don't go so no one feels left out.

Your boss asks you to stay and cover the night shift even though you've been there since you guys opened and you were hoping to have a night to yourself for once, yet you still tell them you can.

You plan to get only your best friend a Christmas present (since, after all, you're a broke college student) but your conscience eats away at you until you leave the mall with 8 more shopping bags than you had originally planned.

Saying no is the hardest thing for you to do. You wish you were better at it.

If you commit one act that you believe shows any ounce of selfishness, you feel terrible. You avoid being selfish at any cost.

Everyone is discussing where they want to eat, and they bring up the one place you cannot stand, but it's that one friend's favorite place (you know, the friend that always wants to get their way no matter what) so naturally you agree to go. As long as everyone else is happy, right?

You'd rather see everyone else in your life happy, even if it means you're not.

I'm sure most people would say this is such an awesome quality to have, what a kind person you are to look out for others as opposed to just yourself. That is such a blessing.

But, little do they know, it is also a curse.

Yes, you always look out for everyone else. And that IS great. But what about you?

You deserve to be happy too. You deserve to get what YOU want sometimes, too.

No one knows how exhausting it is to think of everyone else's interests before your own. Sure, it's wonderful seeing those around you happy and satisfied. And it's nice knowing that you played a role in that. But sometimes it's too much. Sometimes, getting your way is long overdue.

And, before you know it, this "great" quality of yours tends to affect your life in more ways than one. People tend to see you as the friend that will always give or give in, or maybe even the friend that can be looked at as the second choice since they would rather have others before them. And that is just how easily this compassionate characteristic of yours can be taken advantage of.

But that isn't fair and certainly isn't right.

Just because you have the tendency to look out for others doesn't mean you should always be pushed to the wayside. I know. Trust me, I know.

But it's time for everyone else to know. Don't take the people who care for others for granted. Realize that this is a gift. But not one to overuse.

To the girl who wants to please everyone, you are not a second option. Someone like you should definitely be the first. You are a special kind of person and there definitely needs to be more people like you out there. Compassion and empathy are an important thing. Be glad you can exhibit the both of them so strongly and consistently. Recognize that even at your worst, you are able to demonstrate these qualities without a thought about it. One day, the world will start giving back to you. I promise.

Stand up for yourself every now and then. God knows you deserve it.