[As a little disclaimer, my sister is sixteen — only three years younger than me — and we have a pretty close relationship. That being said, we share almost everything with each other and always turn to one another for advice, or when needed, protection. In this case, this protection would be from boys who do not meet my expectations of what my sister deserves. My brothers follow quite closely to the same ideas, except theirs are a little stricter. They would prefer she (and I) hold off from dating until we’re 30 years old. Don’t worry Debs, I’ve got your back. When my sister does start to get more serious about dating, I have a little letter I want this boy to read.]

To the guy who wants to date my little sister,

For starters, I wish you good luck in taking on the trouble my dad and brothers will throw at you from the second you walk in the door for the first time. They didn’t take it easy on me, and they definitely won't take it easy on my sister. However, I promise their bark is worse than their bite.

Something you should know is I have a zero bull-shit policy and believe in well-deserved karma. I may be young, but I have seen many boys treat girls right but also treat girls poorly. I refuse to let my sister be with a boy that doesn’t treat her with the utmost respect and like the treasure she is. I also believe space is very important in a relationship and should be recognized from the beginning. (If) you are still very young when you start dating, do not try to spend every moment with her. She likes to breathe and definitely is a fan of personal time; respect this. Something else you should know is to not expect quick replies if you text her. She leaves her phone in her room and does not look at it often (it’s hard to get used to as I still have to remember this when trying to reach her). Remember how valuable her, and your, time is and don’t waste it when with one another.

My sister is headstrong and follows after her father in knowing how to handle herself but that does not mean she is unbreakable. She is still a young female and we all have our breaking points. Don’t forget to reassure her of how beautiful she is because I don’t think she hears it enough. Don’t try to pry into her business until she lets you know she is comfortable. We are similar in this sense and I can tell you that when she is ready to open up she will, but until then, she will insist on figuring life out on her own. It’s what she and I have done up until now and it’s what she’ll continue to do until she’s ready.

You should probably know my family is close and likes to treasure the time we spend together. Don’t fight that or we won't get along very well. When we do spend time with you, you should probably expect a little friendly teasing but it’s all in good nature and a way for us to show how we protect each other.

This letter may seem slightly intimidating and a bit overboard, but if you can recognize these things and realize how special of a girl you are getting, this seems like nothing. My sister has the biggest heart and the sweetest laugh and I hope you get to hear it every time you are with her. She’s goofy and has a young soul’s sense of entertainment but can handle her serious moments. I am always here if you have any questions and consider myself a reliable source because of how similar we are. However, I am protective and take the big sister role very seriously. So, if you break my sister’s heart in a way I find unsuitable, you may want to stay as far out of reach of me as you can.

I look forward to meeting you and seeing how you make my sister happy.

Best of luck,
The Big Sister