To the Old Me,

I am writing to you as a sophomore in college, a girl who has moved away from home, who is struggling in academics to pursue her dreams, all while facing the multitude of stresses life has to offer. There are just a few things I would like to tell you about how to handle some of what life throws at you.

First of all, I know it may sound like nothing has changed stress-wise, but it really has. The petty fighting you are surrounded by in high school? It doesn't matter. The gossiping you're hearing from the girls who don't know you? Doesn't matter. What do matter are your real friends, and it is up to you to find them. They will stick with you through hell and back, and if they don't, the friendship was never meant to last in the first place. Also, stop freaking out about that assignment you forgot to do. You're going to be fine, it really isn't that big of a deal, and it isn't the end of the world. Yes, college is still waiting for you even if you don't make that A you wanted, the world still goes on.

Also, all of the things that you will soon become concerned with are of a totally different nature. I can promise you, no one will have time to be involved in gossip and drama once they step into the real world. Your issues become more mature, and you focus on things that really matter. For instance: your family, sleep schedule, grades that determine your career path, and trying to figure out if you remembered to eat lunch today. Yes, that also includes cutting out that relationship that causes more harm than good.

That reminds me; toxic relationships are the hardest thing to remove from your life. But in order for you to live a happy, healthy life, you cannot have the person who is supposed to be making you happy dragging you down. And believe it or not, you are going to be okay through it all. Don't spend all of your time being sad and miserable, it isn't worth it and there are plenty more heartaches where that came from. So instead of allowing yourself to be held back by this kind of relationship, spend more time focusing on yourself.

It is important for you to know that it is okay to put yourself first! Regardless of how many times you put others before you in hopes of being a generous person, the majority will play on your kindness and take it for granted. That doesn't mean don't be kind, but it does mean that it is important for you to put your own feelings and priorities ahead of others sometimes.

Apologizing can also go a long way. It is not just your world, and other people have feelings. Sometimes being the bigger person is the best thing you can do and it would save a lot of time and trouble. And please DO NOT settle for never receiving an apology that you know you deserve. Those who care about you and value the relationship that you share will never short you on an apology when an "I'm sorry" is due.

Though, overall if there is one thing that I want you to know, it is that maintaining a relationship with God will solve it all. For those situations that just feel as if they are too much, lay them to His will and what is meant to be will be done. Prayer can resolve all of the internalized stress and turmoil you may be feeling, and it will also keep you on a positive track in life.

Focus on your family and your closest friends, on your grades and your job, and on your love for Christ. Focus on the things that matter in life, because everything that may upset you is temporary. Time will tell all, and this will pass. So, simply enjoy life, and take the time to have fun, because soon you'll have to be focused on bigger, more important things. And you'll miss the times that you wasted concentrating on things that really don't matter.

Sincerely,

Your Future Self