Carl Knowles:
All that I really know about you is that you are the reason that my last name is Knowles. But, that’s all. You were gone before my father could register who you were. Never once have you considered to ever come back. Although this may come off as harsh, this is all that I have ever known about you. There are so many questions that I have about you, but I will never have the opportunity to receive closure. Because you left, my great-grandmother, along with my aunt and uncles, have raised my father to be the most selfless, self-motivated, hardworking, big-hearted man that I have ever known. In a way, it is a blessing in disguise. Would I like to get to know who you were despite your lack of interest in responsibility? To put it simply, yes. Deep down in the depths of my soul, I have always been curious about where my family came from. For years, I have wondered whether there are long lost family members just waiting for me to cross paths with them. You were never apart of my dad’s life, therefore, you were never apart of mine. Frequently I wonder what life would have been like if you were around. If you were in my life, would you still be around right now? Regardless, I hope you found the peace you were craving and earnestly seeking.
Carl Saunders:
I think about you more than I let others believe. My heart shatters at the thought that our memories are gradually fading away as time progresses forward. You were taken away from me way too soon. However, you were in pain, and it was time for the pain to stop. I always cherish the memories that I can recall. I remember your iconic flannel and suspender combo with cigarettes stashed in your shirt pocket. The way you snickered at jokes instead of releasing a belly laugh. The way you held me so tight when you greeted me and made me feel so loved. How peaceful you looked the night I said goodbye to you for the very last time. My only regret is not coming to your funeral. But, I hope you understand it is only because I wanted my last memories of you to be when you were alive and well rather than cold in the casket. Eleven years later and I still love you as much as I loved you then. I hope to visit you soon, before I leave for a little while. I love you, Pop Pop, you are always missed.
