Dear Future Boyfriend,

I hope you know how important you are to me. I'm at the point of my life where I'm not just going to accept any boy that smiles my way, I chose you because I see the qualities in you that I've been praying I would find in a boy. I may only be 20, but I've lived enough to know the type of man I don't want as my boyfriend.

Please love God more than you love me.

Seriously, this is so important. I will never date another boy who doesn't love The Lord. I will only date a man of God. This is the biggest, most important aspect of our relationship. It will make or break our future together, and I hope that you care as much about that as I do. I want to grow in our faith together. "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Let God be that extra cord. If you're struggling in your faith, please come and confide in me. I will help you grow and I will help you fall more in love with your Savior. I know what it's like to lose your faith over someone and I would never wish that on anyone. Your personal relationship with Jesus means more to me than our entire relationship alone.

Please understand me before you date me.

I am painfully aware that I am hard to love at times. Living with anxiety is extremely hard on me, and I know that it can be just as hard on a relationship. Please never blame me for this. I promise you that I try as hard as I can to keep it under control. When I am anxious and have a panic attack: don't ask me why I'm having one, don't blame yourself, don't blame me. Just be patient with me and let it end peacefully. Just as it comes, it goes. It doesn't last forever and it makes it so much easier if you just help me through it.

Understand my family and how much they mean to me. Understand that my mom is my best friend and that my dad is my hero. Understand that family time is one of the most important things to me and understand that your relationship with my family is just as important to me as your relationship with me.

Understand all my quirks, I have a lot of them. Maybe I watch "Bob's Burgers" too much and maybe I say what comes to my mind too much. Maybe I mumble a little and maybe I get irritated a little to fast. Trust me, I know. Don't remind me of how weird I am, or how annoying my habits are. It's what makes me, me. I've spent too much of my life learning to love myself for who I am and I'm not wasting anymore time trying to convince people the same.

Please lift me up when I'm down.

Everyone has bad days and some are worse than others. I don't need you to throw me a pity party. I need you to encourage me that a day is only 24 hours and tomorrow is a new day. Remind me of what I'm capable of and remind me of all the good things about myself. I'm your biggest fan, be mine too. I will be there for you whenever you need me. This is so important! You can't be in a relationship if encouraging each other isn't a second nature. I want you to want to help me. Remind me of who my creator is and lead me to my rock when I need stability.

Please be my best friend.

Honestly, this is one of the most important things to me. I am the goofiest person on this planet, I get it from my mom. Be goofy with me, joke with me, laugh with me! There is nothing more attractive than a hard-working boy with a good personality. I do not like serious people and I do not like when people can't take a joke. However, do not be so silly that I can't take you seriously. There's a fine line between sarcastic and annoying; only cross it sometimes. I want to be able to tell you anything without receiving judgement. You should be the person I can confide in without the fear of you looking down on me. I want to hangout with you and just chill. I cannot stress how much I don't like formal dates, they're so weird and awkward. I want to be able to go to Whataburger and call it a date. I know my worth and I don't need extravagant things to see that.

Please don't change once you finally have me.

I know how it goes. Don't act like you're the best thing to ever happen to me and then quit once we're a few months in. I will continuously proving myself to you and I expect the same in return. I am not wasting my time on someone who doesn't think I'm worthy enough to get the same type of attention you gave me when you first wanted me. I have no problem leaving someone that doesn't appreciate me. I understand that people change, I will be there for you throughout all of that, but don't let it negatively affect our relationship. There's no way I can mentally put up with that again. I may be hard to handle sometimes, but I love really hard. It's a blessing and a curse. I know what I deserve and I'm not lowering my standards for anyone anymore.

I know what it's like to be in a toxic relationship and I will not get into another one. I've been praying for you every day and I hope you're doing the same for me. Thank you for being yourself, I love you for that.