This is a letter to my daughter — my life and my love. As I write this, you are 32 inches tall, babbling in a tongue I pretend to understand, and climbing over my legs as they are laid across the coffee table. You do this so you can sit in my lap, the only place you want to be while sick with a fever. I cherish these moments and hold you close. The writing can wait, for I know they are fleeting. One day, all too soon, your father and I will be dropping you off for your freshman year of college.
Sweetheart, you are too young to know what has been happening in the news recently at Stanford University. A young man did something very bad to a young woman. He took something very special from her and hurt her in an unimaginable way. He has not apologized for what he has done, and I fear he never will. Someday, I will explain it to you in excruciating detail because I feel it's important for you to know. But, today, I write this letter so that one day you may read it and understand. I write this so that one day you will take the thoughts enclosed with you when you spread your wings and fly into this great, wide world.
The truth is that I am afraid. I am so, hopelessly afraid because I know I cannot protect you from the evils of this world. All your father and I can do is be present, teach you as much as we can, and ensure we spend every waking breath making you feel loved. I pray every day that God gives us the courage and wisdom to foster the steadfastness and strength I can already see as you bang on my keyboard and stare right back at me, as if to say, "Yeah, what are you going to do about it?"
A young man named Brock Turner raped a young woman during a fraternity party at Stanford University. Many were drinking alcohol at the party, including Mr. Turner and this young woman. She consumed too much and passed out. She was found behind a dumpster, stripped and unconscious. She only discovered what had actually happened through a police report made public in the local newspaper. I can only imagine how her own mother and father felt upon hearing what happened to their daughter. I try not to because every time I do, I bring myself to tears.
The point is this: The events that occurred on January 18, 2015 were 100 percent preventable... and I do not mean that if Brock Turner had never been born, none of it would have happened. Let me try to explain myself. I have hesitated to even try because I never want to diminish the pain inflicted on this young woman. But, we all have the power to bring an end to what has been named "campus rape" and "drinking culture." Let's stick to that portion of it, shall we, for now? The evils of this world are too numerous and vast for one conversation.
The "drinking culture" on college campuses is unique. It seems that the goal of drinking has shifted from friendly socialization to purposefully getting drunk. When you become drunk, you lose control of your body and mind. Your speech slurs, you cannot keep your balance; and if you consume too much, you can blackout and experience memory loss. This is the gateway to the evil that occurred that night at Stanford University. Please do not misunderstand me. Rape is wrong and never acceptable. However, what if this young woman had not drank more than her body could tolerate? What if she had a sound mind to stand up for herself against unwarranted advances? What if Brock Turner had not drank to excess that night? What if he had considered his Olympics dreams and how they would be affected by the decisions he was making?
My dearest daughter, if there is one piece of advice that you take with you when you leave, please let it be this - be the change you wish to see in the world for someone might be changed just by knowing you. So, go to the party, even have a drink if you like. But, be an example to those around you, you just might save a life... or two.
