An Open Letter To The College Boy That's Scared Of Commitment

An Open Letter To The College Boy That's Scared Of Commitment

"When will you realize that one night stands, no strings attached relationships, and friendships with benefits doesn't make you a man?"
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Boys (not men),

Now, I am sure you are sick of hearing this, but come on. When is it going to end? Will there ever be a time in your life where you stop insisting that almost every relationship you have is strictly no strings attached? Where did the respect go? I mean, don't get me wrong, everyone needs sex. It is scientifically part of us, but there is more to life than just sex. I understand that most of your male minds are wired to believe otherwise, but it is time to grow up. There is a trend with you college boys. You flirt, fuck, and forget. Sometimes you even do it repeatedly giving the girl a small glimmer of hope that you aren't inhumane. The saddest part is that most of these girls are your friends! Your mindless desire for sex takes over, and you forget that there is a respectable young woman in front of you.

Truly though, it is not all your fault. Society has made you this way, and the fact that your kind is now the norm is because we are all allowing this to continue, especially the women who become involved with you. These women allow you to treat them this way, even though it is disgusting. So ask yourself this: What would your mother say? I'd assume she would be disgusted with your behavior, but let's be honest she has no clue. So, imagine your mother as a young woman. Now, imagine her being treated like a piece of meat. I mean that is what you boys are doing. You use these girls for sex, and once you get what you want you are on your way. Believe it or not, these women are more than just a convenience.

I am not saying to bring back the hardcore romance, by any means, but respecting the girl you 'get with' should be a priority. If you can't manage to do that then, simply, don't get with her. These girls are probably amazing, but you won't even take the time to get to know them. That one girl you told your buddies you 'banged' at that one party, may be super smart! That one friend you hooked up with but talked smack about in your group chat with your friends may be beyond kind! That one girl you call you slept with, but ignore because you got what you want (*cough, cough* sex), could be an amazing friend! You don't have to marry them or date them, but would a new friend or acquaintance kill you? I mean, considering you had sex with this girl, I would hope not.

Regardless, boys, it is time to grow up. I am not saying that you guys are awful people for not being in committed relationships. It is college; we all want to live a little. All I ask is that you don't pretend that ever person you have had sexual intercourse with is nonexistent. We are all living, breathing, human beings. It's shocking, I know, but it's true! So befriend us on social media, say hi to us if you see us around, or even be a little crazy and make some conversation. You have to start somewhere, and I would start now. Your glory days aren't going to last for forever bud, remember that.

Oh, and trust me, we don't want to date you either.

Sincerely,

College women everywhere

Cover Image Credit: Her Campus

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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We Spend So Much Time Talking About How Much Men Suck In 2019, That We Forget Girls Are Just As Bad

I always talk about how awful guys can be, but let's take a second to talk about how awful my own sex can be, too.

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In our culture, we tend to place all the blame on guys in most relationships by saying how "all men suck" but what about girls?

Girls can be just as bad.

I'm constantly saying how bad guys can be but yet I never stop to analyze things I've done that weren't okay or things my fellow female friends have done that was awful.

I'm not innocent either, I've done some terrible things to really nice guys in my life.

There was one man in my life that genuinely cared for me and wanted to date me but I didn't feel the same at all and lead him on. I honestly didn't think I was leading him on at first but the minute I realized it I tried to nicely let him down. To this day I feel awful about it because I hurt him the way many other guys in my life have hurt me.

I tend to defend my own gender a lot in conversations and I now understand that I really shouldn't. I've seen so many of my female friends treat great guys terribly and have ignored it for so long because I want to believe that females can't be that awful. I was wrong.

I've had some of my best guy friends get treated like absolute garbage by girls that wanted to just party and partake in the hookup culture rather than be with a great guy. I don't get it.

If you have a great man that you're attracted to and loves you unconditionally why would you want to throw it away to chase after boys that won't remember your name the next day?

I've had to keep secrets for friends before that ate me up inside. I had a friend who cheated on her boyfriend by kissing another man in front of me and kept it quiet.

It is NEVER okay to do that to someone, especially a guy that truly cares about you.

It is NOT OK to be on dating apps while dating someone. If you are dating someone, you're exclusive. There is no need to continue talking to men that obviously don't want to just be your friend. There is no good excuse and if you have to try and justify it to yourself, then it's probably not a good idea.

I honestly made myself believe that females didn't play the games men play with our hearts, but we can be just as bad if not worse than a lot of men.

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