Dear Bully,
I am 20 years old now. I am in my second year of college, and making memories with great people, but I still remember you. I still remember every awful word you said to me. I still remember every tear I cried over you. But I forgive you.
Starting middle school at first excited me, until I walked into my homeroom on the first day and you decided I was going to be your victim. Going to school and knowing you were going to be there to harass me with your friends was the worst feeling I have ever known. I constantly took the long way to class and avoided going to my locker so I didn’t have to see you and be tormented about what I was wearing or how truly repulsive I was. Every day I walked into my house after school and cried, and swore to my mother I wasn’t going back to school but everyday I did, and everyday was a new battle.
Not only did you swear at me, but you called me horrible names and made me feel unwanted, disgusting, and worthless. I begged my mother to let me move in with my grandmother in a different town to get away from you - I would give up being with my family if it meant getting away from you. You made me not want to be me anymore. But I just want you to know you never broke me. Even at my lowest point I had the support of my family and friends to get me through anything you could have possibly done to me.
Most importantly, I am sorry. I am sorry you felt it was necessary to ruin someone else’s middle school experience because your mom was a drunk and your dad wasn’t around. I am sorry you didn’t have enough self-confidence so you tore other people down to feel better. I am sorry you made people fight you in the middle of the hallway so you could go home with a few bruises and hopefully get mom’s attention. I am sorry you didn’t get the good out of anything. I am sorry you hated yourself so much you took it out on me.
I see you still, on Facebook, Instagram, and around town. I see pictures of you laughing with friends and smiling with your family. I wish the best for you and I hope you have grown as a person and changed your ways. I hope you have learned to love yourself and that if you are kind to others it will be returned.
Even though you hurt me so much, and at the time I felt completely lost, I want to say thank you. You taught me that nobody deserves to be bullied, and to always intervene if I see someone treating someone else how you treated me. You taught be to treasure real friendships and avoid the fake ones. You taught me the only way to love yourself is by feeling good about yourself.
Sincerely,
A Survivor
