Dear Black Eyeliner,
Thank you for being my favorite color. You match every outfit that I have ever worn. You are as black as my soul, and I appreciate you for understanding the darkness of my personality. I also appreciate that no matter what brand I buy, you are always the same color -- as black as black can get. Thank you for always staying relatively cheap, no matter the status of the economy. Thank you for being black.
Black eyeliner, thank you for being so smooth. You're honestly smoother than a preppy white frat boy's pick up lines that he says to try and hook up with a girl while drunk off of beer or cheap vodka. The way you glide across my eyelids brings joyful tears to my eyes, but I always hide them so you don't get smudged all over my face.
You're smooth, but you definitely aren't a criminal. You've never done me wrong before, even though I have ruined you countless times. I have used you, gotten rid of you, and used you again, just to make myself look good. I know that my hands tend to be shaky, but the thought of you makes them want to be as still as they can be. You want to be smooth sailing, but my hands want to be a tsunami. That is what makes us perfect for each other -- I make you less uptight, and you create an intense calm in my heart (and on my face).
Dearest black eyeliner, I want to thank you mostly for giving me confidence. It never fails to amaze me that a black line underneath each eye gives me the personality and the power of a successful woman. Without you, I am a scared, tired-looking, weak little girl who pukes before giving a presentation, or even answering a question, in class. But when you come into my life, squiggling yourself onto my lower eyelids, I turn into a confident, intimidating, powerful young woman who publicly voices her opinions and knocks her interviews out of this park. You give me all the confidence in the world, and I appreciate you because of that.
Lastly, I would like to thank you, black eyeliner, for making me feel beautiful. You change the way I see myself when I look into the mirror. You emphasize the beauty of my eyes, illuminating them and making them pop. You make me feel like a natural woman, comfortable in my own skin. I feel beautiful, all because of you. Black eyeliner, you immensely increase my self esteem whenever you line my eyes with your dramatic obsidian pizzazz. I will never let you go.
You have done a lot of good for me, black eyeliner. Thanks for always being there for me. I'll never replace you.
Love,
The Woman You Transformed
