Sitting in the backseat as my family's road trip comes to an end, I heard my younger sister and mother bickering. Despite having my earphones in and my music blasting, I could still hear their voices.

What were they bickering about you ask? Among many things, one core argument they have is about the college application process.

Perhaps it was because my parents had big dreams for us, but the argument seemed very familiar to me. Then I realized why: I had this argument with my parents two years ago when I was going through the same process my sister is now.

It has long been stereotyped by the world that Asians are smart people, known to excel in math. But that is not true. We work hard. We plan and execute. We play the game. Do you want to know why we work so hard? Because the world is evidently still biased against us.

I once read an article in Business Insider about why Asian Americans have such a tough time getting into the Ivy League colleges they aim for. One of the many reasons I have read is that, because of the Asians-are-very-smart stereotype, any Asian who doesn’t reach above a threshold will not be passed, even if they are above the qualifications stated by the college on their admissions webpage.

But should we place blame in race? No, not really. How about placing blame on the world for stereotyping people? No, we can’t blame that either.

What we should be placing blame on is the increased pressure in society for a piece of paper that says you have graduated from high school and then from a certain college (the better the college, the better it is) in order to get a good enough job that pays well enough to help us live our increasingly expensive lives.

It is the pressure to still "be who you are" and yet make enough money for a possible future with a family, a house in the suburbs and maybe a pet.

In its own way, the American college process is definitely more liberal than the rest of the world because of its holistic view, but just because on the outside it is liberal, that doesn't mean that it is on the inside.

We don't and will never know what happens behind those closed doors in colleges while they flip through each application in two minutes. But perhaps what we do know is that, sometimes, no matter how hard life is and no matter how hard you work, some part of life is left up to fate. I am not religious and believe in no god, but I do believe that once you have done all that you can in your own power, it is no longer your problem to worry about.

And that is what I truly want to say to all those students coming into the college process, whether Asian or not: Do your best and believe in yourself. Just because you don't get into Harvard or Northwestern doesn't mean your fate has been decided. It’s all up to you. It’s how you decide to live your life that really counts.

College is only supposed to help you find who you are, not decide the rest of your life. Remember that it is your life. It's your choice.